By Matt Soergel
Young mother with breast cancer trying to build memories with her daughter
May 29, 2012 11:14 AM EDT
Danijela Hughey just wants to stay alive long enough for her daughter to remember her.
Chloe is 3, a busy, friendly girl in a yellow dress that twirls. She knows her mother hurts, but doesn't really understand the why or the how of it.
How could she? How could anyone?
Hughey — known to friends as Dani — just turned 27, a time when the future should stretch in front of her, nothing but possibilities.
Last year, she found a painful lump in her breast. It was cancer. Even after a mastectomy, the removal of lymph nodes and rounds of treatment, it has spread to her bone marrow.
"The condition's terminal," she said in a soft voice, sitting in the sunlight with Chloe in their apartment. "They're just trying to treat it, to keep me alive as long as possible."
See more photos of Dani and Chloe
Every day, after all, gives a chance to build more memories.
Hughey has a "memory box" she's keeping for Chloe. It has her journal, in which she tells her daughter what it was like when she was born, what she was like as a little girl. There are videos, showing the two of them playing. There are photos, including some of Hughey, a longtime runner, finishing the Gate River Run this year.
She felt good that day.
She has good days and bad days, and she doesn't want Chloe to remember her mom as sad, or sick.
"I'm documenting what's going on with me. Fighting for her. Fighting for my life. So I can spend as much time as I can with her."
Hughey was born in Croatia and moved to Germany at age 9. In 2006, she came to Ponte Vedra, not speaking English, to be an au pair for a family there. She liked it: The weather, the people, the opportunities. She stayed, got married, had Chloe. Her marriage fell apart and she became independent, with two jobs, a car and a new apartment in the Tinseltown area.
Then she felt a painful lump in her breast. Oh, you're too young for breast cancer, said the first couple of medical professionals she saw.
She wasn't.
Many people have helped since then. We Care Jacksonville, a group of medical professionals, donated its services. The Mayo Clinic has helped.
And she found comfort the minute she stepped into CrossRoad United Methodist Church near her apartment. People pitched in with meals and money, and she found friends, too. Volunteers from the church help her whenever she needs it, every day.
Melissa Workman and Barbara Crosby were at her apartment on Thursday afternoon, as they are on many days. They said there's nowhere else they'd rather be.
"Once you meet Dani, you don't turn her loose," Crosby said. "You gravitate to her, and can't let her go."
Last fall, the David Garrard Foundation also helped Hughey and nine other single mothers with breast cancer, pitching in for expenses and Christmas spending money. Workman went to the group again this month, asking if there was anything else they could help with. She told of Dani's condition, of her Chloe.
Workman was astonished at the response. The foundation has its annual Fishing for the Cure tournament June 2, and it told her that it will donate all the proceeds, after expenses, to a trust fund for Chloe.
"All I asked for was a month's rent," Workman said, "and now look what happened."
Garrard, the former Jaguars quarterback, is now with the Miami Dolphins. Dani and Chloe's story is personal to him: His mother, Shirley, died of breast cancer just after he turned 16.
"It's a tough, tough, terrible disease that claims too many lives," Garrard said.
And Hughey? "She's a fighter, willing to do whatever it takes to stick around."
Hughey is trying to keep life as normal as possible for Chloe, who will live with her father, Cotey Hughey, after she dies. Chloe still has rules and chores and a set bed time.
"She doesn't get away with anything just because I'm sick," Dani Hughey said.
Chloe knows her mother is hurting. So sometimes she says that she hurts too, in her foot or her belly. She tries to help.
"Even when I lost my hair and was wearing my wigs, she'd say, 'Oh mommy, you're so beautiful.' She didn't understand," Hughey said. "I'm glad for that."
And as early evening sunlight angled through the blinds in their apartment, Chloe snuggled next to her mother and alerted the strangers visiting her to the amazing things happening outside the window.
"It's sunny outside," Chloe marveled. "It's sunny!"
Published in the Florida Times-Union May 29, 2012
Young mother with breast cancer trying to build memories with her daughter
May 29, 2012 11:14 AM EDT
Danijela Hughey just wants to stay alive long enough for her daughter to remember her.
Chloe is 3, a busy, friendly girl in a yellow dress that twirls. She knows her mother hurts, but doesn't really understand the why or the how of it.
How could she? How could anyone?
Hughey — known to friends as Dani — just turned 27, a time when the future should stretch in front of her, nothing but possibilities.
Last year, she found a painful lump in her breast. It was cancer. Even after a mastectomy, the removal of lymph nodes and rounds of treatment, it has spread to her bone marrow.
"The condition's terminal," she said in a soft voice, sitting in the sunlight with Chloe in their apartment. "They're just trying to treat it, to keep me alive as long as possible."
See more photos of Dani and Chloe
Every day, after all, gives a chance to build more memories.
Hughey has a "memory box" she's keeping for Chloe. It has her journal, in which she tells her daughter what it was like when she was born, what she was like as a little girl. There are videos, showing the two of them playing. There are photos, including some of Hughey, a longtime runner, finishing the Gate River Run this year.
She felt good that day.
She has good days and bad days, and she doesn't want Chloe to remember her mom as sad, or sick.
"I'm documenting what's going on with me. Fighting for her. Fighting for my life. So I can spend as much time as I can with her."
Hughey was born in Croatia and moved to Germany at age 9. In 2006, she came to Ponte Vedra, not speaking English, to be an au pair for a family there. She liked it: The weather, the people, the opportunities. She stayed, got married, had Chloe. Her marriage fell apart and she became independent, with two jobs, a car and a new apartment in the Tinseltown area.
Then she felt a painful lump in her breast. Oh, you're too young for breast cancer, said the first couple of medical professionals she saw.
She wasn't.
Many people have helped since then. We Care Jacksonville, a group of medical professionals, donated its services. The Mayo Clinic has helped.
And she found comfort the minute she stepped into CrossRoad United Methodist Church near her apartment. People pitched in with meals and money, and she found friends, too. Volunteers from the church help her whenever she needs it, every day.
Melissa Workman and Barbara Crosby were at her apartment on Thursday afternoon, as they are on many days. They said there's nowhere else they'd rather be.
"Once you meet Dani, you don't turn her loose," Crosby said. "You gravitate to her, and can't let her go."
Last fall, the David Garrard Foundation also helped Hughey and nine other single mothers with breast cancer, pitching in for expenses and Christmas spending money. Workman went to the group again this month, asking if there was anything else they could help with. She told of Dani's condition, of her Chloe.
Workman was astonished at the response. The foundation has its annual Fishing for the Cure tournament June 2, and it told her that it will donate all the proceeds, after expenses, to a trust fund for Chloe.
"All I asked for was a month's rent," Workman said, "and now look what happened."
Garrard, the former Jaguars quarterback, is now with the Miami Dolphins. Dani and Chloe's story is personal to him: His mother, Shirley, died of breast cancer just after he turned 16.
"It's a tough, tough, terrible disease that claims too many lives," Garrard said.
And Hughey? "She's a fighter, willing to do whatever it takes to stick around."
Hughey is trying to keep life as normal as possible for Chloe, who will live with her father, Cotey Hughey, after she dies. Chloe still has rules and chores and a set bed time.
"She doesn't get away with anything just because I'm sick," Dani Hughey said.
Chloe knows her mother is hurting. So sometimes she says that she hurts too, in her foot or her belly. She tries to help.
"Even when I lost my hair and was wearing my wigs, she'd say, 'Oh mommy, you're so beautiful.' She didn't understand," Hughey said. "I'm glad for that."
And as early evening sunlight angled through the blinds in their apartment, Chloe snuggled next to her mother and alerted the strangers visiting her to the amazing things happening outside the window.
"It's sunny outside," Chloe marveled. "It's sunny!"
Published in the Florida Times-Union May 29, 2012
By Matt Soergel
Young mother with breast cancer trying to build memories with her daughter
May 29, 2012 11:14 AM EDT
Danijela Hughey just wants to stay alive long enough for her daughter to remember her.
Chloe is 3, a busy, friendly girl in a yellow dress that twirls. She knows her mother hurts, but doesn't really understand the why or the how of it.
How could she? How could anyone?
Hughey — known to friends as Dani — just turned 27, a time when the future should stretch in front of her, nothing but possibilities.
Last year, she found a painful lump in her breast. It was cancer. Even after a mastectomy, the removal of lymph nodes and rounds of treatment, it has spread to her bone marrow.
"The condition's terminal," she said in a soft voice, sitting in the sunlight with Chloe in their apartment. "They're just trying to treat it, to keep me alive as long as possible."
See more photos of Dani and Chloe
Every day, after all, gives a chance to build more memories.
Hughey has a "memory box" she's keeping for Chloe. It has her journal, in which she tells her daughter what it was like when she was born, what she was like as a little girl. There are videos, showing the two of them playing. There are photos, including some of Hughey, a longtime runner, finishing the Gate River Run this year.
She felt good that day.
She has good days and bad days, and she doesn't want Chloe to remember her mom as sad, or sick.
"I'm documenting what's going on with me. Fighting for her. Fighting for my life. So I can spend as much time as I can with her."
Hughey was born in Croatia and moved to Germany at age 9. In 2006, she came to Ponte Vedra, not speaking English, to be an au pair for a family there. She liked it: The weather, the people, the opportunities. She stayed, got married, had Chloe. Her marriage fell apart and she became independent, with two jobs, a car and a new apartment in the Tinseltown area.
Then she felt a painful lump in her breast. Oh, you're too young for breast cancer, said the first couple of medical professionals she saw.
She wasn't.
Many people have helped since then. We Care Jacksonville, a group of medical professionals, donated its services. The Mayo Clinic has helped.
And she found comfort the minute she stepped into CrossRoad United Methodist Church near her apartment. People pitched in with meals and money, and she found friends, too. Volunteers from the church help her whenever she needs it, every day.
Melissa Workman and Barbara Crosby were at her apartment on Thursday afternoon, as they are on many days. They said there's nowhere else they'd rather be.
"Once you meet Dani, you don't turn her loose," Crosby said. "You gravitate to her, and can't let her go."
Last fall, the David Garrard Foundation also helped Hughey and nine other single mothers with breast cancer, pitching in for expenses and Christmas spending money. Workman went to the group again this month, asking if there was anything else they could help with. She told of Dani's condition, of her Chloe.
Workman was astonished at the response. The foundation has its annual Fishing for the Cure tournament June 2, and it told her that it will donate all the proceeds, after expenses, to a trust fund for Chloe.
"All I asked for was a month's rent," Workman said, "and now look what happened."
Garrard, the former Jaguars quarterback, is now with the Miami Dolphins. Dani and Chloe's story is personal to him: His mother, Shirley, died of breast cancer just after he turned 16.
"It's a tough, tough, terrible disease that claims too many lives," Garrard said.
And Hughey? "She's a fighter, willing to do whatever it takes to stick around."
Hughey is trying to keep life as normal as possible for Chloe, who will live with her father, Cotey Hughey, after she dies. Chloe still has rules and chores and a set bed time.
"She doesn't get away with anything just because I'm sick," Dani Hughey said.
Chloe knows her mother is hurting. So sometimes she says that she hurts too, in her foot or her belly. She tries to help.
"Even when I lost my hair and was wearing my wigs, she'd say, 'Oh mommy, you're so beautiful.' She didn't understand," Hughey said. "I'm glad for that."
And as early evening sunlight angled through the blinds in their apartment, Chloe snuggled next to her mother and alerted the strangers visiting her to the amazing things happening outside the window.
"It's sunny outside," Chloe marveled. "It's sunny!"
Published in the Florida Times-Union May 29, 2012
Young mother with breast cancer trying to build memories with her daughter
May 29, 2012 11:14 AM EDT
Danijela Hughey just wants to stay alive long enough for her daughter to remember her.
Chloe is 3, a busy, friendly girl in a yellow dress that twirls. She knows her mother hurts, but doesn't really understand the why or the how of it.
How could she? How could anyone?
Hughey — known to friends as Dani — just turned 27, a time when the future should stretch in front of her, nothing but possibilities.
Last year, she found a painful lump in her breast. It was cancer. Even after a mastectomy, the removal of lymph nodes and rounds of treatment, it has spread to her bone marrow.
"The condition's terminal," she said in a soft voice, sitting in the sunlight with Chloe in their apartment. "They're just trying to treat it, to keep me alive as long as possible."
See more photos of Dani and Chloe
Every day, after all, gives a chance to build more memories.
Hughey has a "memory box" she's keeping for Chloe. It has her journal, in which she tells her daughter what it was like when she was born, what she was like as a little girl. There are videos, showing the two of them playing. There are photos, including some of Hughey, a longtime runner, finishing the Gate River Run this year.
She felt good that day.
She has good days and bad days, and she doesn't want Chloe to remember her mom as sad, or sick.
"I'm documenting what's going on with me. Fighting for her. Fighting for my life. So I can spend as much time as I can with her."
Hughey was born in Croatia and moved to Germany at age 9. In 2006, she came to Ponte Vedra, not speaking English, to be an au pair for a family there. She liked it: The weather, the people, the opportunities. She stayed, got married, had Chloe. Her marriage fell apart and she became independent, with two jobs, a car and a new apartment in the Tinseltown area.
Then she felt a painful lump in her breast. Oh, you're too young for breast cancer, said the first couple of medical professionals she saw.
She wasn't.
Many people have helped since then. We Care Jacksonville, a group of medical professionals, donated its services. The Mayo Clinic has helped.
And she found comfort the minute she stepped into CrossRoad United Methodist Church near her apartment. People pitched in with meals and money, and she found friends, too. Volunteers from the church help her whenever she needs it, every day.
Melissa Workman and Barbara Crosby were at her apartment on Thursday afternoon, as they are on many days. They said there's nowhere else they'd rather be.
"Once you meet Dani, you don't turn her loose," Crosby said. "You gravitate to her, and can't let her go."
Last fall, the David Garrard Foundation also helped Hughey and nine other single mothers with breast cancer, pitching in for expenses and Christmas spending money. Workman went to the group again this month, asking if there was anything else they could help with. She told of Dani's condition, of her Chloe.
Workman was astonished at the response. The foundation has its annual Fishing for the Cure tournament June 2, and it told her that it will donate all the proceeds, after expenses, to a trust fund for Chloe.
"All I asked for was a month's rent," Workman said, "and now look what happened."
Garrard, the former Jaguars quarterback, is now with the Miami Dolphins. Dani and Chloe's story is personal to him: His mother, Shirley, died of breast cancer just after he turned 16.
"It's a tough, tough, terrible disease that claims too many lives," Garrard said.
And Hughey? "She's a fighter, willing to do whatever it takes to stick around."
Hughey is trying to keep life as normal as possible for Chloe, who will live with her father, Cotey Hughey, after she dies. Chloe still has rules and chores and a set bed time.
"She doesn't get away with anything just because I'm sick," Dani Hughey said.
Chloe knows her mother is hurting. So sometimes she says that she hurts too, in her foot or her belly. She tries to help.
"Even when I lost my hair and was wearing my wigs, she'd say, 'Oh mommy, you're so beautiful.' She didn't understand," Hughey said. "I'm glad for that."
And as early evening sunlight angled through the blinds in their apartment, Chloe snuggled next to her mother and alerted the strangers visiting her to the amazing things happening outside the window.
"It's sunny outside," Chloe marveled. "It's sunny!"
Published in the Florida Times-Union May 29, 2012
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