A LOVING TRIBUTE ♥¸.•*´¯♥
(¯'•♥•´¯)☆ ♥ FOR THIS,
*'•.¸(¯'•♥•´¯)¸.•♥♥ MY
☆ º ' '•.¸.•´ « ♥♥ BELOVED
... ♫ ♥¸.•*´¯♥ ❤ MOMMIE
(¸.•´ (¸.•¨¯'♥'*•.¸
♥ •●۰FOREVER LOVED & MISSED۰●• ♥¸.•*´¯♥
Mommie left this earth at 1:07 PM today, April 27, 2014
We are sad, so sad that our mommie is gone from this earth but we know in our hearts that she is with daddy now, that she is in a wonderful place, no pain, no fear, no more confusion.
❤
Heaven is brighter with this precious soul joining our family already there.¸¸♥
★ ° ☾ ☆ ¸. ¸ ★ :. • ○ ° ★ . * . .. • ○ ° ★ . • ○ ° ★ ° .Rhoda • ★ ° . . ☾ °☆ . ° ☾ ° ☆ ¸. • ★ ° ☾ ☆ ¸. ¸ ★ :. • ○ ° * ● • ○ ° ★ .. • ○• ★ ° . . Wife ☾ °☆. * . ★. ° . Mommie ● .° ☾ ° ☆ ° ☾ ° ☆¸. • ★ ° ☾ ☆ ¸. ¸ ★ :. • ○ ° ¸. ● . • ○★.. • ○★ ° ☾ ☆ ¸. ¸ ★ :. . • ○ ° ★ . Grandma * ... • ○.¸ . ° ★ ¸. * ● ¸ . ° ☾ ° ¸. ● ¸ . ★ ° . • ° . . ¸ . ● ¸ ★ ★ ☾ ° ★ . . ° ☆ . ● ¸ . ★ ° . • ○ ° ★ . *Daughter . ☾ ° ¸. * ● ¸ ° ☾ ° ☆ . * ¸. ★ ° . • ★ °. * ● ¸ ° ☾ ° ☆ . * ● Sister¸ ° ☾ ° ☆ ¸. • ★ ° ☾ ☆ ¸. ¸ ★ :. • ○ ° ° ☾ ° ☆ . * . * . . ☾ ° ☆ Aunt . * ● ¸ . ° ☾ ° ☆ ¸. • ★ ° ☾ ☆ ¸. ¸ ★ :. • ○ °
★ ° :.Friend . • ○ ° . * . . ° . ● . ° ☾ ° ☆ ¸. • ★ ° ☾ ☆ ¸. ¸ ★ :. • ○ °
Perhaps they are not stars in the sky,
but rather openings where our loved ones
shine through to let us know they are safe and happy
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Last night as my sister and I sat with mommie she'd raise her right hand toward the ceiling and looking up she'd say, "I wanta go, I wanta go somewhere." To pacify her more than anything, we'd tell her that we'd go tomorrow. She took us at our word... she did go, the next day, Sunday, she went home.
We were sitting with her and noticed that there was such a hush in the air. We took a step to her bed and she was gone. She didn't make a sound, didn't move at all… just the 'hush' and stillness in the room. She was so very beautiful, so peaceful.
Sister and I have talked about it and we believe in our hearts that the 'hush' in that room was when mommie left this world and went home to be with daddy.
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I feel so very blessed, she was there when I came into this world and I feel so very fortunate to have been there when she left it.
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The evening before mommie passed, I walked up to her bed, she looked at me, raised up, lifted her right hand to me, smiled the most beautiful smile and said, "There's my baby doll." Such a wonderful memory to carry with me.
♥ಌڿڰۣಌ♥ L٥ﻻ ﻉ√٥υ f٥гﻉ√ﻉг ♥ಌڿڰۣಌ♥
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God is good.
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Years ago, the Winter I was pregnant with my son, my son's dad and I didn't have the money to buy a coat for me.
Mommie gave me her coat.
It was soooo warm. There was no hesitation, no question in the fact that she was giving me the coat. This may not seem like a lot to some folks, but to me, it's everything. You see, being mommie, she always put her babies first... this was no different, this was the only NEW coat she'd ever had. She gave it to me and that night as we left for the short drive home, she buttoned that coat around me, hugged me and said, "I love you baby doll. You stay warm and be careful."
Never in my life have I worn something that meant so very much to me. Not only was my body warmed by mommie's coat, my heart and soul was and always will be warmed by her love for me.
I loveyou, mommie
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With all my heart and soul, I loveyou mommie. I owe so very much of who I am today as a person, a woman , a mother, to you.
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when you left...
a piece of my heart went with you...
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Rhoda is the daughter of Dolphus and Flossie 'Watson' Self.
She married Joe W. Vaughn on April 23, 1955 at Wayton, Arkansas.
They had four children together and she is survived by all of them, Beverly Joe, Franklin Dean, Clifton Wiley and Tamara Lynn.
She is also survived by ten grandchildren; Ricky and Ronald Waters, Tonka Joe Myers, Micah 'Vaughn' Grantham and Darren Vaughn, Kortnie 'Clark' House and Whitney 'Clark' Terry, Kassi 'Vaughn' Cockrum and Zach Vaughn and Byron James Vaughn, fourteen great grandchildren; Trinity Myers, Shaylee, Stetson, Shalako and Sydney Grantham, Bailey, Logan and Hadley Joe House, Wiley, Lydia and Isabella Cockrum, Dalton, Taylor and Hayden Vaughn.
She will be missed by two women that were special to her and her to them, Chris Clark and Marilyn Willis.
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Mommie was born and grew up at Shiloh, AR. After she married daddy she moved to Wayton, AR. where she would spend the rest of her life.
Working on the farm, raising a huge garden, canning and freezing in the summer for the winter to come, milking the cow, helping to cut wood for the winter's heat, working with daddy at anything that needed mending on 'the place' as they called their 20 acre home/farm.
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Anytime daddy was out working around the place mommie wouldn't be very far away. From the day they started building their home at Wayton, she worked with him side by side, building fence, working the garden, any chore that needed done, they did it together.
Some of my most precious memories are of the two of them working side by side around 'the place'.
Often times one of the two of them would get hurt (nothing serious) while they were working together. It was almost like a comedy routine. As kids, we knew that if we hung around and waited long enough we'd be rewarded with something that was akin to the funny things one sees on TV. We still talk about the great times we remember with mommie and daddy out around the place fixing things. Some of those special memories include the two of them stretching barb wire fencing, putting up a pigeon box, baby frogs on the pond bank... just to name a few.
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Seems there was nothing that mommie couldn't do. She knitted and crocheted, pieced and quilted quilts, embroidered, could make anything grow, from garden goods to houseplants. She loved to read. She passed her love of a good book on to me! Our mutual favorite is 'Girl of the Limberlost' by Gene Stratton Porter.
Anytime one of us kids was sick, mommie would sit with us. I can almost feel her cool hand on my forehead. She spoiled all of us by scratching our backs. Even with all the work she did with her hands she always had the most gorgeous nails and would sit for what seemed like hours and scratch our backs. Even as adults she'd do this. Her babies were her life.
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The Little Ship ♥¸¸.•*¨*•.. I stood watching as the little ship sailed out to sea. The setting sun tinted her white sails with a golden light, and as she disappeared from sight a voice at my side whispered, "She is gone". But the sea was a narrow one. On the farther shore a little band of friends had gathered to watch and wait in happy expectation. Suddenly they caught sight of the tiny sail and at the very moment when my companion had whispered, "She is gone" a glad shout went up in joyous welcome, "Here she comes!"
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The songs played at mommie's graveside were:
Amazing Grace. on bagpipes (mommie loved to hear Amazing Grace played on bagpipes)
The Rose. by Bette Midler
That Long Black Train. by Josh Turner (one of mommie's favorite songs)
I'm Coming Home. by Skylar Grey
Byron, an especially beloved grandson, was in charge of the music for his gramma, he did an awesome job!
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One of mommie's granddaughters had something that she and her daughter had written and she read it at mommie's graveside.
My sister had given mommie a poem a few years ago on Mother's Day. Not long ago my sister found that poem in mommie's purse, she'd carried it with her for many years. My sister read this poem for mommie as she stood near her casket. When she was finished reading it the song The Rose started playing. My sister asked anyone that wanted to take part to step up, take a rose and place it in mommie's casket spray. The arrangement was made of white lilies and blue hydrangeas with ivy and fern mixed in. When the last rose was placed among the original flowers and the last bars of The Rose faded away, mommie's casket spray was alive with the colors of the roses left by friends and loved ones. Red, blue, yellow, orange and pink roses mingled with the rest to light up the spray.
I'm sure mommie was with daddy and they were smiling!
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This is the poem my sister read for mommie...
What is a Mom????
She's the whisper of the leaves
as you walk down the road.
She's the smell of bleach
in your freshly laundered socks.
She's the cool hand on your brow
when you're not well.
Your mom lives inside your laughter.
She's crystallized in every tear drop.
she's the place you came from,
your first home.
She's the map you follow
with every step that you take.
She's your first love
and your first heart break.
Nothing on earth can separate you.
Not time, not space, not even death...
will ever separate you from your mom...
You carry her inside your heart!
Your MOM Is Always With You.
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A Hundred Years From Now...
...it will not matter
what your bank account was,
the sort of house you lived in,
or the kind of car you drove...
but the world will be different
because you were important
in the life of a CHILD...
Mommie... YOU were important in this child's life ♥
...and in the lives of so many other children...
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May 5, 2014
Twice as Much
I have felt the pain of heartache
in the days since you have passed
and never again will I take for granted
how long a life will last...
Each lifetime has a limit
from the date of its creation.
We only choose our life's direction,
not its beginning... or duration.
You lived and loved a lifetime
within the years that you were blessed,
and I mourn, because without you,
I now must live the rest.
It is I who suffer;
I who grieve.
You are gone, and now content.
And if you could,
I know you would
erase these tears I've spent.
It is I who loved so deeply
and so much of me, is you...
that when you left this earthly place,
a part of me left, too.
Though our hearts are joined forever,
linked by invisible chains,
the time has come for me to see
that much of "me" remains.
Every day you're in my head.
Every day you're in my heart.
Every morning through day's end,
you occupy a part.
We walked this earth together;
our lives are intertwined...
so I shall live this life I have
as two lifetimes... combined.
Twice as long, I'll gaze at sunsets.
Twice as many times, I'll laugh.
Twice as hard, I'll seize these moments
I now live on your behalf.
Twice as deeply, I will care.
Twice as tough, I'll bear the sorrow.
Twice as real I'll live each day
and thank God twice for each tomorrow.
Twice as strong I'll smell the roses.
Twice this vow, I will renew:
Until we meet again one day,
Twice As Much, I'll Live For You.
by Linda Ellis
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Mommie's Obit
Rhoda V. (Self) Vaughn, age 80 of Wayton, Arkansas, the daughter of Dolphus and Flossie (Watson) Self, was born July 15, 1933 in Shiloh, Arkansas, and went to be with our Lord on Sunday, April 27, 2014.
Rhoda enjoyed her farm life. She loved quilting, cooking, gardening, and being outdoors, as well as spending time with family and friends. She was recognized for a beautiful home and often times her gardening, canning and crafting skills. She made a hobby of hand piecing and quilting unique quilts for her family and friends to enjoy. She loved collecting swans, buttons, dinking in her rock beds and making bottle trees out of her blue bottle collection.
Preceding her in death; her husband, Joe W. Vaughn, whom she married April 23, 1955; her parents; one brother, Riley Watson; and three sisters, Lucille Vaughn, Daisy Lyon and Minnie Wade.
She is survived by her children, Beverly Joe Vaughn of Rogers, Arkansas, Franklin Vaughn and Lori of Wayton, Wiley Vaughn and Marci of Lowell, Arkansas, and Tamara Vaughn of Rogers, Arkansas; eight grandkids; 16 great-grandkids; three sisters, Mary Ellen Young of Bentonville, Arkansas, Georgia Brown of Knob Hill, Arkansas, and Opha Daniels and Gerald of Shiloh; one brother, Roy Self and Reba of Shiloh; and a sister-in-law, Fern Reynolds of Harrison, Arkansas; along with a dear friend, Thelma Wight of Bentonville, Arkansas.
Graveside service was Wednesday, April 30, 2014 at Snow Cemetery in Wayton, Arkansas with Donnie Villines officiating. Pallbearers were Monte Willis, Danny Breedlove, Ricky Henderson, Roy Carter, Charlie Curtis, Clinton Taylor.
Honorary pallbearers were the staff of Bradford House Rehab and Nursing Facility in Bentonville, Arkansas.
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The Rose
~ by Bette Midler
Some say love, it is a river
That drowns the tender reed.
Some say love, it is a razor
That leaves your soul to bleed.
Some say love, it is a hunger,
An endless aching need.
I say love, it is a flower,
And you it's only seed.
It's the heart, afraid of breaking,
That never learns to dance.
It's the dream, afraid of waking,
That never takes a chance.
It's the one who won't be taken,
Who cannot seem to give.
And the soul, afraid of dyin',
That never learns to live.
When the night has been too lonely,
And the road has been too long,
And you think that love is only
For the lucky and the strong,
Just remember in the winter
Far beneath the bitter snows,
Lies the seed, that with the sun's love,
In the spring becomes the rose
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A very special thank you to two couples who made the days after mommie's passing so much easier.
Kaye & Jimmy House and Samantha 'Sam' & David 'Papa' Green
These people gave of their time, their homes, shoulders to cry on and ears to hear our words when that's what we needed most. They gave us food and rest for our bodies and nourishment for our very souls. There are no words to express how much we, as a family, appreciate all they did for us.
Sam, Poppa, Kay & Jimmy our hearts are a bit easier because you cared enough to step in and be there for us. Everyone should be so very blessed.
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May 8, 2014
A first cousin of mine, a nephew of mommie's, (daddy's sister's son) sent me a card after mommie 'went home'.
I have his permission to use 'his words' about mommie.
This is what Phil wrote in the card...
"Beverly, I fell in love with your mother the minute I first saw her. That love has only deepened through the years.
Your folks were a beautiful couple and you can't think about one without also seeing the other."
Mommie and daddy were married when Phil was just a little boy of eight and a half years old. He's never made any bones about the fact that he's loved mommie so dearly, not ever and she worshiped the very ground that he walked on.
This is what he sent me in a email a day or so ago after I'd sent him a link to mommie's memorial page.
"Your Dad used to tease me about 'flirting' with his woman. You've got to remember it was little Phil Snow with the big black thick glasses, hair that went every way except where it was suppose to, and what face that wasn't pale white was filled with pimples. And the fact that your Mom (the most gorgeous woman I had ever seen) was even acknowledging my existence much less actually caring about me, just blew me away! You most certainly have my humble permission to use any words of love for your Mother, for I loved her dearly as well. There is a picture of me and her (she is sitting down beside me, outside) that I hope I can find. God Bless you Beverly, We love you Cuz' Phil"
I remember daddy teasing Phil when he was older about flirting with his woman. They'd raz each other back and forth and mommie just looked on and smiled.
I can only imagine the agony of his first crush as a little fella.
Words like his are a balm to my heart and soul.
I loveyou Cuz
קєαςє ☮ Լ♡√є ♥ J☼Ƴ
May 22, 2014
Phil found, scanned and emailed me the pic of him and mommie that's in her pics on this memorial.
This is what he wrote in the message, "On the back of this picture is written (it looks like my Mom's handwriting) Rhoda Vaughn (21) Phil Snow (5) July 1955. Check out the Indian outfit that I'm wearing which I'm sure Mom made. It had to have been one of the best days of my life!
Love you cuz'"
Getting things like this and hearing how much mommie meant to the people in her life is such a soothing balm when memories become a bit painful. Thank you for sharing, Phil.
Loveyou, too, cuz xox
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May 11, 2014
Mother's Day
God looked around his garden
and found an empty place,
He then looked down upon the earth
and saw your tired face.
He put his arms around you
and lifted you to rest.
God's garden must be beautiful,
He always takes the best.
He knew that you were suffering,
he knew you were in pain.
He knew that you would never
get well on earth again.
He saw the road was getting rough
and the hills were hard to climb.
So he closed your weary eyes
and whispered, 'Peace be thine'.
It broke our hearts to lose you
but you didn't go alone,
For part of us went with you
the day God called you home.
Happy Mother's Day mommie, your first one again with daddy after what must have, to you, seemed like so many years
loveyou, mommie xox
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May 12, 2014
As the days have passed since mommie left this earth, I'm still reminded of what a wonderful impact she had on the lives of others.
Just this evening I got a card from a cousin's wife that we've not seen nor had contact with in years.
In the card Barbara wrote of how nice mommie was to her, what a "good and kind" person mommie was.
It seems I just get the tears dried and a blessing like her card comes along.
But as my sister says, "It's all good!"
Thank you, Barbara
YOUR kindness will never be forgotten.
God bless and keep you.
loveNhugs, Bev
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July 12, 2014
I loveyou, mommie xox
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Mommie, your stone was set a week ago today (7.7.2014).
Sister and I went to visit you and daddy yesterday.
Your stone is beautiful but, seeing it has set in motion another phase of letting you go... and today it's been pretty rough, emotionally.
With time it'll be a bit easier. I do know that.
I loveyou mommie. Tonight, I miss you very, very much! XOX
7.14.2014
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Mommie, I saw some pretty flowers when I left work this evening. The first thing I thought was, "Mommie would love these."
I have such great memories of all the flowers you used to grow, both inside and outside. You could grow anything!
The memory that came to mind this evening was of our 'walks' around the 'houses' you lived in over the last two years of your life.
How you'd select this flower, then that one, then have me reach through and pluck one that had especially caught your eye.
We'd return to your room with your lap full of beautiful 'pretties' but the most beautiful sight for my eyes was the wonderful smile on your face during and after our walk.
All my life you filled my world with beautiful, awesome things, but most of all you filled my heart with your love.
I loveyou, mommie ♥
7.17.2014
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wish I could've had one of your hugs today.
loveyou, mommie ♥ xox
9.11.2014
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Mommie, I can close my eyes and see your sweet face, watch it light up and a smile spread ear to ear when you see your babies are with you.
I loveyou, mommie
9.19.2014
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Just a couple of weeks ago sister and I were down home. We went to the home place where we grew up.
As I walked around the yard and room to room in the home that daddy and mommie built for all of us, built with love, with their own hands, every board, rock and chunk of concrete was put on that piece of land by those two people.
Daddy and mommie loved each other, they loved us kids, they loved their home and the life that, over the years they'd built from pretty much nothing. As I looked at all the things the hands of those two wonderful people had touched over all the years, I felt that somehow it's wrong for them to be gone and all the things they created to still be here. Not a rational thought maybe, but to me, as I touched the things they'd touched, I somehow wanted to trade... all those things for mommie and daddy. A fair trade I think.
October 2014
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~What moves through us is a silence, a quiet sadness, a longing for one more day, one more word, one more touch, we may not understand why you left this earth so soon, or why you left before we were ready to say good-bye, but little by little, we begin to remember not just that you are gone, but that you lived. And that your life gave us memories too beautiful to forget~
~ Anonymous
11.8.2014
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I Didn't Really Die
They say that life is fleeting
I know that this is true
I left this world so quickly
With no goodbye to you.
I know how much you miss me
Your tears fall ever light
The pillow where you lay your head
Is wet with them at night.
I know your heart is hurting
The words we left, unsaid
I love yous left unspoken
Are spinning in your head.
The strength that I have carried
That served to make you whole
Remains to make you stronger
Within your grieving soul.
For you see, while you were weeping
On the day I passed away
At the gravesite near the flowers
Where my loved ones knelt to pray.
An angel came to see me
She took me by the hand
She led me to a kingdom
In a very distant land.
As I look down from the heaven
And see you standing there
Your heart so ever burdened
With more weight than it can bear.
I long to bring you comfort
I long to give you peace
I long to hold you closely
Cause all your tears to cease.
The joy I've found in heaven
Goes far beyond compare
The love that's so elusive
Can be found here everywhere.
The light is softly shining
There's no storm clouds here or rain
There's no teardrops found in heaven
There's no suffering, there's no pain.
You needn't be so troubled
Stay close to God and pray
That someday we'll be together
One bright and glorious day.
So my beloved, you shouldn't question
My dear you need not cry
I've gone to be with Jesus
You see, I really didn't die.
~ unknown
mommie, I don't think we ever left an 'I love you' unsaid. We never missed the chance for one last hug, a kiss and an I loveyou...
I loveyou, mommie xox
11.13.2014
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The 27th of this month, Thanksgiving Day, mommie will have been with daddy for seven months. It will be a day of mixed emotions but I'm keeping in my heart the memories I have of mommie and daddy, the life they shared, the love they felt for each other and us kids. I'm so thankful to have had these two people as my parents.
Over the last week or so my sister and I have been going through all the pictures that mommie had... and she had a bunch!
So very many times it has been bittersweet, seeing the world through her eyes from the pictures she took in the last years of her life of her babies, Bubba Dean and Callie Lou, (her kitties) and all her human babies.
As I told my sister after seeing so many pictures of the home and yard we knew growing up and even up until the last couple of years of mommie's life, it is soooo hard to believe that all that was as we knew it with mommie and daddy, is gone, the home place is there but so deserted now that neither daddy nor mommie are there to welcome us.
I ran across a picture of mommie on the beach feeding seagulls. One of her few wishes was to see the ocean and walk in it. She got to do that. My sister, nephew and I took her to Houston to visit my son, Tonka, mommie's first grandchild and his family. My sister's son, Byron, (he was with us) is her last. We all took her to the beach at Galveston, she had a blast. She was like a little kid. We took goodies to feed the gulls and kept telling her not to look up... but she did anyway. Not long after we got there a seagull flew right over her head and pooped all over the hood of a car near us. The look on her face was priceless when she turned my way. She was laughing her butt off and asked me if that was why she shouldn't look up, I told her that 'Yep! It was!"
The picture of her feeding the gulls is on here as is one of Tonka leading her out of the water. He got off balanced and almost fell and if he had, he have taken her down with him. He asked her when they got to dry sand what she'd have done if they'd both have fallen. She told him she'd have scrambled around and gotten up and made sure her baby was OK. (by baby, she meant him) Nothing ever changed with her, always lookin out for her babies. ~:}
I set the picture of her feeding the gulls as my desktop. Tonight after getting home from Wally World and setting down to check my email, I was looking at the pic of her. Just pure joy... it's such a wonderful thing to know we shared that time with her and got to see one of her life wishes fulfilled.
She wasn't a world traveler but the world she created for us with her love has left me with more riches than any thing on this earth could ever provide me.
I loveyou, mommie!
Don't look up! ~:}
11.20.2014
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I asked a little Angel
that lives up in the sky,
"Why do we have tears
whenever we start to cry?"
The Angel answered, "Peace be Still,"
and I will tell you this:
When all the love is in your heart
and no more love will fit,
the extra love spills over
and tears begin to fall
Tears just mean you love them;
More than ever, Most of All
loveyou, mommie xox
11.26.2014
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A few nights ago I was wrapping Christmas gifts and as I was taping the wrapping paper in place my mind drifted back to Christmases years ago.
There was never money for little extras, like tape and bows. The wrapping paper was carefully smoothed, folded and put away for use the next year. Daddy and mommie spent the extra money on things that mattered in our lives.
I remember opening gifts tied with string and sometimes mommie used her straight pins to hold the paper in place. We knew to keep the pins and not lose'em, because she didn't have the money to waste on replacing them. Those Christmas morning memories are golden now.
As soon as daddy would get up, build a fire and the house would get warm, we'd hurry outa bed and gather on the floor in front of the Christmas tree.
It was always a cedar that daddy had cut from near our home. It was decorated with a few 'store bought' decorations, but mostly ones we'd made ourselves. The foil tinsel was saved year to year and is still one of the brightest parts of my Christmas memories.
The whole house smelled of cedar and the food, cakes and pies, mommie had cooked in the preceding days. I can close my eyes and the memories are almost as rich as the aromas from those long ago days.
After our gifts were opened and our 'socks' were emptied we'd gather our prizes around us for a short time of checking out each others' goodies and enjoying our bounty.
In short order mommie would have breakfast ready. Always a wonderful country meal, one that I took for granted then but truly appreciate now. There'd be home-made biscuits, fried eggs, gravy, some kind of fried meat and lots of fresh cow's milk. The meat and eggs were grown there on our place and mommie kept the cow milked, so we always had as much fresh milk as we could drink.
And mommie always made 'chocolate' or chocolate gravy, as some call it. We'd mix it with fresh churned cow butter and 'sop' the biscuits in it for a mouthwatering finish to a wonderful meal.
This was pretty much an everyday breakfast for us but as I said earlier, I never appreciated it until much later.
This is the first year that I won't spend Christmas with either daddy or mommie, so it will be a lonely time in a sense. I know that they're together again and that gives me peace.
Thank you daddy and mommie for so many wonderful Christmas mornings and memories to treasure to the end.
I loveyou both and miss you so much.
Your baby doll. Beverly Joe XOX
12.24.2014
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Was sitting here tonight looking at a picture of mommie. In the picture her hair is kinda messed up, but it always was after she spent most of her time in bed.
For years I kept mommie's hair trimmed for her. One day sister and I were down home and I was giving mommie a trim and just outa the blue she said, "Beverly Joe (she always used my first and middle name when she was serious or I was in trouble), Beverly Joe, when I die I want you to fix my hair for me and if it needs to be cut, I want you to take care of it." I was kinda shocked, but then not really. Mommie pretty much always spoke her mind.
Anyway, I told her that I would and she made me promise.
After she died, sister and I went to the funeral home and I kept my promise. I'd wondered after she'd died if it would be difficult, but it really wasn't, it was a peaceful few minutes that I spent with mommie, fulfilling her last request for me and doing for her what she wanted no one else to do.
I was sitting here tonight looking at the picture of her, thinking about that last haircut I gave her and it came to me... she was without a doubt the first one to 'fix' my hair after I was born, I had lots of hair, and I was the last one to 'fix' her hair after she died.
Beginnings and endings... all tied together and running in, around and through each other.
I feel so blessed to be able to do that one last thing for mommmie.
I loveyou mommie...
I miss you...
12.03.2015
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mommie, I got your name added to daddy's adopt-a-hiway sign, it looks so awesome. I remember how proud you were when sister and I took you to see it when we had it put up for daddy, now you're on it with him!! ... and they DID take it down and correct the spelling of your name.
loveyou mommie xox
12.15.2016
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I saw a post on FB just a bit ago.
On it was this poem written by a man for his wife.
It says it all.
Do not ask me to remember,
Don't try to make me understand,
Let me rest and know you're with me,
Kiss my cheek and hold my hand.
I'm confused beyond your concept,
I am sad and sick and lost.
All I know is that I need you
To be with me at all cost.
Do not lose your patience with me,
Do not scold or curse or cry.
I can't help the way I'm acting,
Can't be different though I try.
Just remember that I need you,
That the best of me is gone,
Please don't fail to stand beside me,
Love me 'til my life is done.
– Owen Darnell
¸.•*¨*• ❤
Dementia is such a cruel, cruel disease.
It was so difficult to watch mommie slip further and further away from us with each passing day. So hard to reconcile the confused, scared soul I visited each day with the strong, fearless woman that taught me everything I needed to live my life... EVERYTHING!
It was so heart & soul nourishing to have her hug me to her, to kiss me like she always had, always, from the time of my birth, before I have memory to the last hug we shared. To hear her say, "There's my baby doll", to see a huge smile light her face as I went to her and let her pull me to her in a gesture of love as old as the ages.
No matter how old I am nor how long I live, I will always, ALWAYS miss my mommie.
bjv 02.14.2018
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09.19.2018
I heard your voice in the wind today
and I turned to see your face;
The warmth of the wind caressed me
as I stood silently in place.
I felt your touch in the sun today
as its warmth filled the sky;
I closed my eyes for your embrace
and my spirit soared high.
I saw your eyes in the window pane
as I watched the falling rain;
It seemed as each raindrop fell
it quietly said your name.
I held you close in my heart today
it made me feel complete;
You may have died...but you are not gone
you will always be a part of me.
As long as the sun shines...
the wind blows...
the rain falls...
You will live on inside of me forever
for that is all my heart knows.
loveyou, mommie xox
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03.02.2024
"Two Ladies"
They sit upon their shaded porch,
A respite from the day,
Living history under eaves,
There sitting on display.
They looked out on the fields and trees,
The land that held their soul,
Two ladies resting from their work,
The young of long ago.
Their apron stained with this and that,
Their gray heads both held high,
Memories of a hundred years
Relived there in their eyes.
The wrinkled hands that held the plow
In furrows long and straight,
Are hands that cooled a fevered brow
And filled a supper plate.
The lines of life are etched on them,
Their lives about complete,
Two ladies rest there in the shade,
A respite from the heat.
Their cradles rocked so long ago,
To tunes we'll never know,
Two ladies rest upon the porch,
The young of long ago."
~ Linda Lee
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A LOVING TRIBUTE ♥¸.•*´¯♥
(¯'•♥•´¯)☆ ♥ FOR THIS,
*'•.¸(¯'•♥•´¯)¸.•♥♥ MY
☆ º ' '•.¸.•´ « ♥♥ BELOVED
... ♫ ♥¸.•*´¯♥ ❤ MOMMIE
(¸.•´ (¸.•¨¯'♥'*•.¸
♥ •●۰FOREVER LOVED & MISSED۰●• ♥¸.•*´¯♥
Mommie left this earth at 1:07 PM today, April 27, 2014
We are sad, so sad that our mommie is gone from this earth but we know in our hearts that she is with daddy now, that she is in a wonderful place, no pain, no fear, no more confusion.
❤
Heaven is brighter with this precious soul joining our family already there.¸¸♥
★ ° ☾ ☆ ¸. ¸ ★ :. • ○ ° ★ . * . .. • ○ ° ★ . • ○ ° ★ ° .Rhoda • ★ ° . . ☾ °☆ . ° ☾ ° ☆ ¸. • ★ ° ☾ ☆ ¸. ¸ ★ :. • ○ ° * ● • ○ ° ★ .. • ○• ★ ° . . Wife ☾ °☆. * . ★. ° . Mommie ● .° ☾ ° ☆ ° ☾ ° ☆¸. • ★ ° ☾ ☆ ¸. ¸ ★ :. • ○ ° ¸. ● . • ○★.. • ○★ ° ☾ ☆ ¸. ¸ ★ :. . • ○ ° ★ . Grandma * ... • ○.¸ . ° ★ ¸. * ● ¸ . ° ☾ ° ¸. ● ¸ . ★ ° . • ° . . ¸ . ● ¸ ★ ★ ☾ ° ★ . . ° ☆ . ● ¸ . ★ ° . • ○ ° ★ . *Daughter . ☾ ° ¸. * ● ¸ ° ☾ ° ☆ . * ¸. ★ ° . • ★ °. * ● ¸ ° ☾ ° ☆ . * ● Sister¸ ° ☾ ° ☆ ¸. • ★ ° ☾ ☆ ¸. ¸ ★ :. • ○ ° ° ☾ ° ☆ . * . * . . ☾ ° ☆ Aunt . * ● ¸ . ° ☾ ° ☆ ¸. • ★ ° ☾ ☆ ¸. ¸ ★ :. • ○ °
★ ° :.Friend . • ○ ° . * . . ° . ● . ° ☾ ° ☆ ¸. • ★ ° ☾ ☆ ¸. ¸ ★ :. • ○ °
Perhaps they are not stars in the sky,
but rather openings where our loved ones
shine through to let us know they are safe and happy
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Last night as my sister and I sat with mommie she'd raise her right hand toward the ceiling and looking up she'd say, "I wanta go, I wanta go somewhere." To pacify her more than anything, we'd tell her that we'd go tomorrow. She took us at our word... she did go, the next day, Sunday, she went home.
We were sitting with her and noticed that there was such a hush in the air. We took a step to her bed and she was gone. She didn't make a sound, didn't move at all… just the 'hush' and stillness in the room. She was so very beautiful, so peaceful.
Sister and I have talked about it and we believe in our hearts that the 'hush' in that room was when mommie left this world and went home to be with daddy.
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I feel so very blessed, she was there when I came into this world and I feel so very fortunate to have been there when she left it.
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The evening before mommie passed, I walked up to her bed, she looked at me, raised up, lifted her right hand to me, smiled the most beautiful smile and said, "There's my baby doll." Such a wonderful memory to carry with me.
♥ಌڿڰۣಌ♥ L٥ﻻ ﻉ√٥υ f٥гﻉ√ﻉг ♥ಌڿڰۣಌ♥
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God is good.
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Years ago, the Winter I was pregnant with my son, my son's dad and I didn't have the money to buy a coat for me.
Mommie gave me her coat.
It was soooo warm. There was no hesitation, no question in the fact that she was giving me the coat. This may not seem like a lot to some folks, but to me, it's everything. You see, being mommie, she always put her babies first... this was no different, this was the only NEW coat she'd ever had. She gave it to me and that night as we left for the short drive home, she buttoned that coat around me, hugged me and said, "I love you baby doll. You stay warm and be careful."
Never in my life have I worn something that meant so very much to me. Not only was my body warmed by mommie's coat, my heart and soul was and always will be warmed by her love for me.
I loveyou, mommie
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With all my heart and soul, I loveyou mommie. I owe so very much of who I am today as a person, a woman , a mother, to you.
────(♥)(♥)(♥)────(♥)(♥)(♥)
──(♥)██████(♥)(♥)██████(♥)
─(♥)████████(♥)████████(♥)
─(♥)█████████████_████(♥)
──(♥)████████████████(♥)
────(♥)████████████(♥)
──────(♥)████████(♥)
────────(♥)████(♥)
─────────(♥)██(♥)
───────────(♥)
when you left...
a piece of my heart went with you...
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Rhoda is the daughter of Dolphus and Flossie 'Watson' Self.
She married Joe W. Vaughn on April 23, 1955 at Wayton, Arkansas.
They had four children together and she is survived by all of them, Beverly Joe, Franklin Dean, Clifton Wiley and Tamara Lynn.
She is also survived by ten grandchildren; Ricky and Ronald Waters, Tonka Joe Myers, Micah 'Vaughn' Grantham and Darren Vaughn, Kortnie 'Clark' House and Whitney 'Clark' Terry, Kassi 'Vaughn' Cockrum and Zach Vaughn and Byron James Vaughn, fourteen great grandchildren; Trinity Myers, Shaylee, Stetson, Shalako and Sydney Grantham, Bailey, Logan and Hadley Joe House, Wiley, Lydia and Isabella Cockrum, Dalton, Taylor and Hayden Vaughn.
She will be missed by two women that were special to her and her to them, Chris Clark and Marilyn Willis.
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Mommie was born and grew up at Shiloh, AR. After she married daddy she moved to Wayton, AR. where she would spend the rest of her life.
Working on the farm, raising a huge garden, canning and freezing in the summer for the winter to come, milking the cow, helping to cut wood for the winter's heat, working with daddy at anything that needed mending on 'the place' as they called their 20 acre home/farm.
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Anytime daddy was out working around the place mommie wouldn't be very far away. From the day they started building their home at Wayton, she worked with him side by side, building fence, working the garden, any chore that needed done, they did it together.
Some of my most precious memories are of the two of them working side by side around 'the place'.
Often times one of the two of them would get hurt (nothing serious) while they were working together. It was almost like a comedy routine. As kids, we knew that if we hung around and waited long enough we'd be rewarded with something that was akin to the funny things one sees on TV. We still talk about the great times we remember with mommie and daddy out around the place fixing things. Some of those special memories include the two of them stretching barb wire fencing, putting up a pigeon box, baby frogs on the pond bank... just to name a few.
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Seems there was nothing that mommie couldn't do. She knitted and crocheted, pieced and quilted quilts, embroidered, could make anything grow, from garden goods to houseplants. She loved to read. She passed her love of a good book on to me! Our mutual favorite is 'Girl of the Limberlost' by Gene Stratton Porter.
Anytime one of us kids was sick, mommie would sit with us. I can almost feel her cool hand on my forehead. She spoiled all of us by scratching our backs. Even with all the work she did with her hands she always had the most gorgeous nails and would sit for what seemed like hours and scratch our backs. Even as adults she'd do this. Her babies were her life.
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The Little Ship ♥¸¸.•*¨*•.. I stood watching as the little ship sailed out to sea. The setting sun tinted her white sails with a golden light, and as she disappeared from sight a voice at my side whispered, "She is gone". But the sea was a narrow one. On the farther shore a little band of friends had gathered to watch and wait in happy expectation. Suddenly they caught sight of the tiny sail and at the very moment when my companion had whispered, "She is gone" a glad shout went up in joyous welcome, "Here she comes!"
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The songs played at mommie's graveside were:
Amazing Grace. on bagpipes (mommie loved to hear Amazing Grace played on bagpipes)
The Rose. by Bette Midler
That Long Black Train. by Josh Turner (one of mommie's favorite songs)
I'm Coming Home. by Skylar Grey
Byron, an especially beloved grandson, was in charge of the music for his gramma, he did an awesome job!
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One of mommie's granddaughters had something that she and her daughter had written and she read it at mommie's graveside.
My sister had given mommie a poem a few years ago on Mother's Day. Not long ago my sister found that poem in mommie's purse, she'd carried it with her for many years. My sister read this poem for mommie as she stood near her casket. When she was finished reading it the song The Rose started playing. My sister asked anyone that wanted to take part to step up, take a rose and place it in mommie's casket spray. The arrangement was made of white lilies and blue hydrangeas with ivy and fern mixed in. When the last rose was placed among the original flowers and the last bars of The Rose faded away, mommie's casket spray was alive with the colors of the roses left by friends and loved ones. Red, blue, yellow, orange and pink roses mingled with the rest to light up the spray.
I'm sure mommie was with daddy and they were smiling!
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This is the poem my sister read for mommie...
What is a Mom????
She's the whisper of the leaves
as you walk down the road.
She's the smell of bleach
in your freshly laundered socks.
She's the cool hand on your brow
when you're not well.
Your mom lives inside your laughter.
She's crystallized in every tear drop.
she's the place you came from,
your first home.
She's the map you follow
with every step that you take.
She's your first love
and your first heart break.
Nothing on earth can separate you.
Not time, not space, not even death...
will ever separate you from your mom...
You carry her inside your heart!
Your MOM Is Always With You.
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A Hundred Years From Now...
...it will not matter
what your bank account was,
the sort of house you lived in,
or the kind of car you drove...
but the world will be different
because you were important
in the life of a CHILD...
Mommie... YOU were important in this child's life ♥
...and in the lives of so many other children...
❤ •*¨*•.¸¸❤❤¸.•*¨*• ❤
May 5, 2014
Twice as Much
I have felt the pain of heartache
in the days since you have passed
and never again will I take for granted
how long a life will last...
Each lifetime has a limit
from the date of its creation.
We only choose our life's direction,
not its beginning... or duration.
You lived and loved a lifetime
within the years that you were blessed,
and I mourn, because without you,
I now must live the rest.
It is I who suffer;
I who grieve.
You are gone, and now content.
And if you could,
I know you would
erase these tears I've spent.
It is I who loved so deeply
and so much of me, is you...
that when you left this earthly place,
a part of me left, too.
Though our hearts are joined forever,
linked by invisible chains,
the time has come for me to see
that much of "me" remains.
Every day you're in my head.
Every day you're in my heart.
Every morning through day's end,
you occupy a part.
We walked this earth together;
our lives are intertwined...
so I shall live this life I have
as two lifetimes... combined.
Twice as long, I'll gaze at sunsets.
Twice as many times, I'll laugh.
Twice as hard, I'll seize these moments
I now live on your behalf.
Twice as deeply, I will care.
Twice as tough, I'll bear the sorrow.
Twice as real I'll live each day
and thank God twice for each tomorrow.
Twice as strong I'll smell the roses.
Twice this vow, I will renew:
Until we meet again one day,
Twice As Much, I'll Live For You.
by Linda Ellis
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Mommie's Obit
Rhoda V. (Self) Vaughn, age 80 of Wayton, Arkansas, the daughter of Dolphus and Flossie (Watson) Self, was born July 15, 1933 in Shiloh, Arkansas, and went to be with our Lord on Sunday, April 27, 2014.
Rhoda enjoyed her farm life. She loved quilting, cooking, gardening, and being outdoors, as well as spending time with family and friends. She was recognized for a beautiful home and often times her gardening, canning and crafting skills. She made a hobby of hand piecing and quilting unique quilts for her family and friends to enjoy. She loved collecting swans, buttons, dinking in her rock beds and making bottle trees out of her blue bottle collection.
Preceding her in death; her husband, Joe W. Vaughn, whom she married April 23, 1955; her parents; one brother, Riley Watson; and three sisters, Lucille Vaughn, Daisy Lyon and Minnie Wade.
She is survived by her children, Beverly Joe Vaughn of Rogers, Arkansas, Franklin Vaughn and Lori of Wayton, Wiley Vaughn and Marci of Lowell, Arkansas, and Tamara Vaughn of Rogers, Arkansas; eight grandkids; 16 great-grandkids; three sisters, Mary Ellen Young of Bentonville, Arkansas, Georgia Brown of Knob Hill, Arkansas, and Opha Daniels and Gerald of Shiloh; one brother, Roy Self and Reba of Shiloh; and a sister-in-law, Fern Reynolds of Harrison, Arkansas; along with a dear friend, Thelma Wight of Bentonville, Arkansas.
Graveside service was Wednesday, April 30, 2014 at Snow Cemetery in Wayton, Arkansas with Donnie Villines officiating. Pallbearers were Monte Willis, Danny Breedlove, Ricky Henderson, Roy Carter, Charlie Curtis, Clinton Taylor.
Honorary pallbearers were the staff of Bradford House Rehab and Nursing Facility in Bentonville, Arkansas.
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The Rose
~ by Bette Midler
Some say love, it is a river
That drowns the tender reed.
Some say love, it is a razor
That leaves your soul to bleed.
Some say love, it is a hunger,
An endless aching need.
I say love, it is a flower,
And you it's only seed.
It's the heart, afraid of breaking,
That never learns to dance.
It's the dream, afraid of waking,
That never takes a chance.
It's the one who won't be taken,
Who cannot seem to give.
And the soul, afraid of dyin',
That never learns to live.
When the night has been too lonely,
And the road has been too long,
And you think that love is only
For the lucky and the strong,
Just remember in the winter
Far beneath the bitter snows,
Lies the seed, that with the sun's love,
In the spring becomes the rose
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A very special thank you to two couples who made the days after mommie's passing so much easier.
Kaye & Jimmy House and Samantha 'Sam' & David 'Papa' Green
These people gave of their time, their homes, shoulders to cry on and ears to hear our words when that's what we needed most. They gave us food and rest for our bodies and nourishment for our very souls. There are no words to express how much we, as a family, appreciate all they did for us.
Sam, Poppa, Kay & Jimmy our hearts are a bit easier because you cared enough to step in and be there for us. Everyone should be so very blessed.
❤ •*¨*•.¸¸❤❤¸.•*¨*• ❤
May 8, 2014
A first cousin of mine, a nephew of mommie's, (daddy's sister's son) sent me a card after mommie 'went home'.
I have his permission to use 'his words' about mommie.
This is what Phil wrote in the card...
"Beverly, I fell in love with your mother the minute I first saw her. That love has only deepened through the years.
Your folks were a beautiful couple and you can't think about one without also seeing the other."
Mommie and daddy were married when Phil was just a little boy of eight and a half years old. He's never made any bones about the fact that he's loved mommie so dearly, not ever and she worshiped the very ground that he walked on.
This is what he sent me in a email a day or so ago after I'd sent him a link to mommie's memorial page.
"Your Dad used to tease me about 'flirting' with his woman. You've got to remember it was little Phil Snow with the big black thick glasses, hair that went every way except where it was suppose to, and what face that wasn't pale white was filled with pimples. And the fact that your Mom (the most gorgeous woman I had ever seen) was even acknowledging my existence much less actually caring about me, just blew me away! You most certainly have my humble permission to use any words of love for your Mother, for I loved her dearly as well. There is a picture of me and her (she is sitting down beside me, outside) that I hope I can find. God Bless you Beverly, We love you Cuz' Phil"
I remember daddy teasing Phil when he was older about flirting with his woman. They'd raz each other back and forth and mommie just looked on and smiled.
I can only imagine the agony of his first crush as a little fella.
Words like his are a balm to my heart and soul.
I loveyou Cuz
קєαςє ☮ Լ♡√є ♥ J☼Ƴ
May 22, 2014
Phil found, scanned and emailed me the pic of him and mommie that's in her pics on this memorial.
This is what he wrote in the message, "On the back of this picture is written (it looks like my Mom's handwriting) Rhoda Vaughn (21) Phil Snow (5) July 1955. Check out the Indian outfit that I'm wearing which I'm sure Mom made. It had to have been one of the best days of my life!
Love you cuz'"
Getting things like this and hearing how much mommie meant to the people in her life is such a soothing balm when memories become a bit painful. Thank you for sharing, Phil.
Loveyou, too, cuz xox
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May 11, 2014
Mother's Day
God looked around his garden
and found an empty place,
He then looked down upon the earth
and saw your tired face.
He put his arms around you
and lifted you to rest.
God's garden must be beautiful,
He always takes the best.
He knew that you were suffering,
he knew you were in pain.
He knew that you would never
get well on earth again.
He saw the road was getting rough
and the hills were hard to climb.
So he closed your weary eyes
and whispered, 'Peace be thine'.
It broke our hearts to lose you
but you didn't go alone,
For part of us went with you
the day God called you home.
Happy Mother's Day mommie, your first one again with daddy after what must have, to you, seemed like so many years
loveyou, mommie xox
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May 12, 2014
As the days have passed since mommie left this earth, I'm still reminded of what a wonderful impact she had on the lives of others.
Just this evening I got a card from a cousin's wife that we've not seen nor had contact with in years.
In the card Barbara wrote of how nice mommie was to her, what a "good and kind" person mommie was.
It seems I just get the tears dried and a blessing like her card comes along.
But as my sister says, "It's all good!"
Thank you, Barbara
YOUR kindness will never be forgotten.
God bless and keep you.
loveNhugs, Bev
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July 12, 2014
I loveyou, mommie xox
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Mommie, your stone was set a week ago today (7.7.2014).
Sister and I went to visit you and daddy yesterday.
Your stone is beautiful but, seeing it has set in motion another phase of letting you go... and today it's been pretty rough, emotionally.
With time it'll be a bit easier. I do know that.
I loveyou mommie. Tonight, I miss you very, very much! XOX
7.14.2014
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Mommie, I saw some pretty flowers when I left work this evening. The first thing I thought was, "Mommie would love these."
I have such great memories of all the flowers you used to grow, both inside and outside. You could grow anything!
The memory that came to mind this evening was of our 'walks' around the 'houses' you lived in over the last two years of your life.
How you'd select this flower, then that one, then have me reach through and pluck one that had especially caught your eye.
We'd return to your room with your lap full of beautiful 'pretties' but the most beautiful sight for my eyes was the wonderful smile on your face during and after our walk.
All my life you filled my world with beautiful, awesome things, but most of all you filled my heart with your love.
I loveyou, mommie ♥
7.17.2014
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wish I could've had one of your hugs today.
loveyou, mommie ♥ xox
9.11.2014
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Mommie, I can close my eyes and see your sweet face, watch it light up and a smile spread ear to ear when you see your babies are with you.
I loveyou, mommie
9.19.2014
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Just a couple of weeks ago sister and I were down home. We went to the home place where we grew up.
As I walked around the yard and room to room in the home that daddy and mommie built for all of us, built with love, with their own hands, every board, rock and chunk of concrete was put on that piece of land by those two people.
Daddy and mommie loved each other, they loved us kids, they loved their home and the life that, over the years they'd built from pretty much nothing. As I looked at all the things the hands of those two wonderful people had touched over all the years, I felt that somehow it's wrong for them to be gone and all the things they created to still be here. Not a rational thought maybe, but to me, as I touched the things they'd touched, I somehow wanted to trade... all those things for mommie and daddy. A fair trade I think.
October 2014
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~What moves through us is a silence, a quiet sadness, a longing for one more day, one more word, one more touch, we may not understand why you left this earth so soon, or why you left before we were ready to say good-bye, but little by little, we begin to remember not just that you are gone, but that you lived. And that your life gave us memories too beautiful to forget~
~ Anonymous
11.8.2014
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I Didn't Really Die
They say that life is fleeting
I know that this is true
I left this world so quickly
With no goodbye to you.
I know how much you miss me
Your tears fall ever light
The pillow where you lay your head
Is wet with them at night.
I know your heart is hurting
The words we left, unsaid
I love yous left unspoken
Are spinning in your head.
The strength that I have carried
That served to make you whole
Remains to make you stronger
Within your grieving soul.
For you see, while you were weeping
On the day I passed away
At the gravesite near the flowers
Where my loved ones knelt to pray.
An angel came to see me
She took me by the hand
She led me to a kingdom
In a very distant land.
As I look down from the heaven
And see you standing there
Your heart so ever burdened
With more weight than it can bear.
I long to bring you comfort
I long to give you peace
I long to hold you closely
Cause all your tears to cease.
The joy I've found in heaven
Goes far beyond compare
The love that's so elusive
Can be found here everywhere.
The light is softly shining
There's no storm clouds here or rain
There's no teardrops found in heaven
There's no suffering, there's no pain.
You needn't be so troubled
Stay close to God and pray
That someday we'll be together
One bright and glorious day.
So my beloved, you shouldn't question
My dear you need not cry
I've gone to be with Jesus
You see, I really didn't die.
~ unknown
mommie, I don't think we ever left an 'I love you' unsaid. We never missed the chance for one last hug, a kiss and an I loveyou...
I loveyou, mommie xox
11.13.2014
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The 27th of this month, Thanksgiving Day, mommie will have been with daddy for seven months. It will be a day of mixed emotions but I'm keeping in my heart the memories I have of mommie and daddy, the life they shared, the love they felt for each other and us kids. I'm so thankful to have had these two people as my parents.
Over the last week or so my sister and I have been going through all the pictures that mommie had... and she had a bunch!
So very many times it has been bittersweet, seeing the world through her eyes from the pictures she took in the last years of her life of her babies, Bubba Dean and Callie Lou, (her kitties) and all her human babies.
As I told my sister after seeing so many pictures of the home and yard we knew growing up and even up until the last couple of years of mommie's life, it is soooo hard to believe that all that was as we knew it with mommie and daddy, is gone, the home place is there but so deserted now that neither daddy nor mommie are there to welcome us.
I ran across a picture of mommie on the beach feeding seagulls. One of her few wishes was to see the ocean and walk in it. She got to do that. My sister, nephew and I took her to Houston to visit my son, Tonka, mommie's first grandchild and his family. My sister's son, Byron, (he was with us) is her last. We all took her to the beach at Galveston, she had a blast. She was like a little kid. We took goodies to feed the gulls and kept telling her not to look up... but she did anyway. Not long after we got there a seagull flew right over her head and pooped all over the hood of a car near us. The look on her face was priceless when she turned my way. She was laughing her butt off and asked me if that was why she shouldn't look up, I told her that 'Yep! It was!"
The picture of her feeding the gulls is on here as is one of Tonka leading her out of the water. He got off balanced and almost fell and if he had, he have taken her down with him. He asked her when they got to dry sand what she'd have done if they'd both have fallen. She told him she'd have scrambled around and gotten up and made sure her baby was OK. (by baby, she meant him) Nothing ever changed with her, always lookin out for her babies. ~:}
I set the picture of her feeding the gulls as my desktop. Tonight after getting home from Wally World and setting down to check my email, I was looking at the pic of her. Just pure joy... it's such a wonderful thing to know we shared that time with her and got to see one of her life wishes fulfilled.
She wasn't a world traveler but the world she created for us with her love has left me with more riches than any thing on this earth could ever provide me.
I loveyou, mommie!
Don't look up! ~:}
11.20.2014
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I asked a little Angel
that lives up in the sky,
"Why do we have tears
whenever we start to cry?"
The Angel answered, "Peace be Still,"
and I will tell you this:
When all the love is in your heart
and no more love will fit,
the extra love spills over
and tears begin to fall
Tears just mean you love them;
More than ever, Most of All
loveyou, mommie xox
11.26.2014
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A few nights ago I was wrapping Christmas gifts and as I was taping the wrapping paper in place my mind drifted back to Christmases years ago.
There was never money for little extras, like tape and bows. The wrapping paper was carefully smoothed, folded and put away for use the next year. Daddy and mommie spent the extra money on things that mattered in our lives.
I remember opening gifts tied with string and sometimes mommie used her straight pins to hold the paper in place. We knew to keep the pins and not lose'em, because she didn't have the money to waste on replacing them. Those Christmas morning memories are golden now.
As soon as daddy would get up, build a fire and the house would get warm, we'd hurry outa bed and gather on the floor in front of the Christmas tree.
It was always a cedar that daddy had cut from near our home. It was decorated with a few 'store bought' decorations, but mostly ones we'd made ourselves. The foil tinsel was saved year to year and is still one of the brightest parts of my Christmas memories.
The whole house smelled of cedar and the food, cakes and pies, mommie had cooked in the preceding days. I can close my eyes and the memories are almost as rich as the aromas from those long ago days.
After our gifts were opened and our 'socks' were emptied we'd gather our prizes around us for a short time of checking out each others' goodies and enjoying our bounty.
In short order mommie would have breakfast ready. Always a wonderful country meal, one that I took for granted then but truly appreciate now. There'd be home-made biscuits, fried eggs, gravy, some kind of fried meat and lots of fresh cow's milk. The meat and eggs were grown there on our place and mommie kept the cow milked, so we always had as much fresh milk as we could drink.
And mommie always made 'chocolate' or chocolate gravy, as some call it. We'd mix it with fresh churned cow butter and 'sop' the biscuits in it for a mouthwatering finish to a wonderful meal.
This was pretty much an everyday breakfast for us but as I said earlier, I never appreciated it until much later.
This is the first year that I won't spend Christmas with either daddy or mommie, so it will be a lonely time in a sense. I know that they're together again and that gives me peace.
Thank you daddy and mommie for so many wonderful Christmas mornings and memories to treasure to the end.
I loveyou both and miss you so much.
Your baby doll. Beverly Joe XOX
12.24.2014
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Was sitting here tonight looking at a picture of mommie. In the picture her hair is kinda messed up, but it always was after she spent most of her time in bed.
For years I kept mommie's hair trimmed for her. One day sister and I were down home and I was giving mommie a trim and just outa the blue she said, "Beverly Joe (she always used my first and middle name when she was serious or I was in trouble), Beverly Joe, when I die I want you to fix my hair for me and if it needs to be cut, I want you to take care of it." I was kinda shocked, but then not really. Mommie pretty much always spoke her mind.
Anyway, I told her that I would and she made me promise.
After she died, sister and I went to the funeral home and I kept my promise. I'd wondered after she'd died if it would be difficult, but it really wasn't, it was a peaceful few minutes that I spent with mommie, fulfilling her last request for me and doing for her what she wanted no one else to do.
I was sitting here tonight looking at the picture of her, thinking about that last haircut I gave her and it came to me... she was without a doubt the first one to 'fix' my hair after I was born, I had lots of hair, and I was the last one to 'fix' her hair after she died.
Beginnings and endings... all tied together and running in, around and through each other.
I feel so blessed to be able to do that one last thing for mommmie.
I loveyou mommie...
I miss you...
12.03.2015
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mommie, I got your name added to daddy's adopt-a-hiway sign, it looks so awesome. I remember how proud you were when sister and I took you to see it when we had it put up for daddy, now you're on it with him!! ... and they DID take it down and correct the spelling of your name.
loveyou mommie xox
12.15.2016
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I saw a post on FB just a bit ago.
On it was this poem written by a man for his wife.
It says it all.
Do not ask me to remember,
Don't try to make me understand,
Let me rest and know you're with me,
Kiss my cheek and hold my hand.
I'm confused beyond your concept,
I am sad and sick and lost.
All I know is that I need you
To be with me at all cost.
Do not lose your patience with me,
Do not scold or curse or cry.
I can't help the way I'm acting,
Can't be different though I try.
Just remember that I need you,
That the best of me is gone,
Please don't fail to stand beside me,
Love me 'til my life is done.
– Owen Darnell
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Dementia is such a cruel, cruel disease.
It was so difficult to watch mommie slip further and further away from us with each passing day. So hard to reconcile the confused, scared soul I visited each day with the strong, fearless woman that taught me everything I needed to live my life... EVERYTHING!
It was so heart & soul nourishing to have her hug me to her, to kiss me like she always had, always, from the time of my birth, before I have memory to the last hug we shared. To hear her say, "There's my baby doll", to see a huge smile light her face as I went to her and let her pull me to her in a gesture of love as old as the ages.
No matter how old I am nor how long I live, I will always, ALWAYS miss my mommie.
bjv 02.14.2018
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09.19.2018
I heard your voice in the wind today
and I turned to see your face;
The warmth of the wind caressed me
as I stood silently in place.
I felt your touch in the sun today
as its warmth filled the sky;
I closed my eyes for your embrace
and my spirit soared high.
I saw your eyes in the window pane
as I watched the falling rain;
It seemed as each raindrop fell
it quietly said your name.
I held you close in my heart today
it made me feel complete;
You may have died...but you are not gone
you will always be a part of me.
As long as the sun shines...
the wind blows...
the rain falls...
You will live on inside of me forever
for that is all my heart knows.
loveyou, mommie xox
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03.02.2024
"Two Ladies"
They sit upon their shaded porch,
A respite from the day,
Living history under eaves,
There sitting on display.
They looked out on the fields and trees,
The land that held their soul,
Two ladies resting from their work,
The young of long ago.
Their apron stained with this and that,
Their gray heads both held high,
Memories of a hundred years
Relived there in their eyes.
The wrinkled hands that held the plow
In furrows long and straight,
Are hands that cooled a fevered brow
And filled a supper plate.
The lines of life are etched on them,
Their lives about complete,
Two ladies rest there in the shade,
A respite from the heat.
Their cradles rocked so long ago,
To tunes we'll never know,
Two ladies rest upon the porch,
The young of long ago."
~ Linda Lee
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