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HJ (#46937296)
 member for 8 years, 21 days
[Add to MyFriends]
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Bio Photo 1. SEND SOURCE INFO!!! When sending info for inclusion on memorials I have entered, please include your source (where you found it, or how you know it). This is important. If I think the info is questionable, I might not add it, or will note who sent it to me. I decline to perpetuate errata and will NOT post anything from an unreliable source.

2. MANNERS COUNT. I appreciate POLITE requests and corrections. If you don't know how to use the words, "please," and "thank you," or can't be bothered, then please don't bother at all. If you send extremely rude, or threatening messages, no matter how subtle, I will forward them to the Find A Grave administrators, without exception.

3. I TRANSFER. Aside from my own family, and close friends, I do not hoard memorials. POLITE requests for your family (close, OR distant), and close friends will all be considered. If I am even remotely related, I will not transfer. I will keep my friends, unless your relationship is significantly closer. If you are prone to entering sloppy memorials with incorrect info, I will think twice about a transfer.

4. YOUR PHOTOS: Please don't add bad photos to memorials I have entered, i.e. photos where you can be seen reflected in the stone, your car is in the background, the stone is covered in bird poop, or leaves, or dirt, your dog, or kid can be seen, or photos taken at a carelessly crooked angle, or ones with more "white space," than gravestone (NO need to crop ALL the white space out, and photos of entire family plots are the exception). Please do not add photographs of new graves in their entirety, with no grass growing on the freshly up-turned dirt. Please do not add photos of the temporary plastic grave markers placed by the funeral home, or photos of the gravestone, prior to inscribing of the DOD for new burials--if you do, please anticipate that I will request a removal when a photo of a fully inscribed gravestone has been posted. I spend a lot of time to make attractive, respectful memorials. Your help with that is appreciated.

Note: If the persons grave has no marker, please at least add a photo of the area where the grave is located.

5. MY PHOTOS, those of gravestones and cemeteries, may be used without my permission, EXCEPT on, or any site which requires an exchange of money. There is no need to give me credit and in fact, I would prefer that you don't. However, please do not post one of my original photos to a Find A Grave memorial yourself. Politely make a request and I will gladly add, if appropriate.

6. CAUSES OF DEATH are a matter of public record. If you are related to an individual who has a cause of death posted in their memorial, and you are disturbed by the posting of that cause, I will remove it, upon polite request.

7. I VOLUNTEER. As another member has noted on their profile, I'm not getting paid to do this. Nope, not a penny. I sometimes get behind in doing corrections, updates, etc. Your patience is appreciated. Please remember that edits take time, no one is entitled to my time, and demands are wholly unappreciated (please refer to point #2 above). If you can't wait, you may send the edit request to Find A Grave.

8. LIVING PEOPLE: Please don't add memorials for them, especially, if you haven't yet entered a memorial for YOURSELF. Not only is it against policy, but it's just a horrendous thing to do to someone, without their consent.

9. LIVE & LET LIVE. I am all for receiving and sending updates, corrections, etc. I appreciate notification when I have added a duplicate and will notify others of duplicates. Beyond that, I do not consider myself to be on the Find A Grave police squad, and neither should you. Please allow me to tend to the memorials I have entered. If I add something you don't like to a memorial you have entered, or to that of a family member's, please point it out to me POLITELY. Vague references to Find A Grave policies are not helpful in specific instances--I have entered hundreds of memorials and manage hundreds more. Above all, please remember that Find A Grave IS NOT REAL. The internet is NOT TANGIBLE. What does that mean? In the grand scheme of life, this is small stuff and could go "poof" in an instant.

10. To those who are all about the numbers: THERE IS NO END TO DEAD PEOPLE. Just because I might enter a memorial you wanted to enter, doesn't mean you can't enter one for someone else. There are plenty for all.


In Honor of Our Fallen Brave . . .

In Flanders Fields, 1919, by John McCrae

In Flanders fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses, row on row,
That mark our place; and in the sky
The larks, still bravely singing, fly
Scarce heard amid the guns below.

We are the Dead. Short days ago
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,
Loved and were loved, and now we lie,
In Flanders fields.

Take up our quarrel with the foe:
To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders fields.


THANK YOU to everyone who sends info and corrections for memorials I have entered. Time does not permit me to thank everyone for each individual contribution, but please know that they are appreciated!

In case I have missed anyone, THANK YOU to the PHOTO VOLUNTEERS who have fulfilled my requests--much appreciated!

MANY THANKS to those MEMBERS who have entered memorials for members of my family and who have had the kindness to transfer them to me--you're the BEST!


PRIVATELY OWNED CEMETERIES & PHOTOGRAPHY Privately owned cemeteries may regulate the taking of photographs by persons physically within the boundaries of the cemetery property. Please refer to the laws of the relevant state. More discussion may be perused here: (Courtesy of Find A Grave Member Diehard, profile # 46809256)


Finally, when I die, please no one euphemistically assert that I have "passed." It sounds so impolite, as though a catastrophic gastric feux pas has occurred, and won't fool anyone into thinking I have done something other than dropping DEAD. Geesh, we all do it, so I don't think it is taboo to say it. Furthermore, I shall haunt anyone designating my date of death as an "angel day," or similar nonsense. How presumptuous it would be for anyone, except God, to make such an assumption.
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Messages left for HJ (975)[Leave Message]
Lois and Daughters
Would you like to have these Wyllie memorials.
Added by Lois and Daughters on Sep 26, 2015 2:47 PM
Lois and Daughters
Did I complete your request okay - thanks Lois
Added by Lois and Daughters on Sep 25, 2015 5:43 PM
RE: Betsy Randolph

I did not see any other monument at her grave. It was just a flat stone on the ground with that oval disk with her information. I could not find any other markings.

I could go out and take a picture of the area she is buried, so you can have a better idea of what her plot looks like. Let me know if you would like additional pictures.

Added by DBCofer on Sep 19, 2015 3:32 PM
Betsy Randolph

I see a photo request for Betsy Randolph. Her grave marker picture is already on her memorial page and when I went to the cemetery the other day, I could not take a picture as clear as the one on her page.

I live very close to the cemetery, let me know what you need and I will be glad to take care of it for you. If you have any questions, please ask.

Added by DBCofer on Sep 18, 2015 3:13 PM
John F. Smeltzer
RE: Thank you
HJ .... I reviewed my GOWDEY / GOWDY file and find that John GOWDEY b. 1816 married to Magdalena VanBuren Russell b. 1813 were in fact parents to John Henry GOWDEY b. 1839. Sorry it has taken me so long to figure this out. You were trying to connect / link the families.
Added by John F. Smeltzer on Sep 11, 2015 4:54 AM
Andy Gappa
RE: Robert Blair
Got his wife, two of his kids (including an unknown infant), and his parents! It was a bonanza for you. Glad I could help.
Andy Gappa
Added by Andy Gappa on Aug 26, 2015 3:45 PM
Liz H.
RE: Otterson&Smith
I have updated the captions, I hope to your satisfaction! Let me know if you'd like me to add anything more.
Added by Liz H. on Aug 25, 2015 3:04 PM
Liz H.
RE: Otterson&Smith
You're very welcome.

and FYI - If you were not aware of the following obituaries for your family members, they helped make the search interesting for my husband and I yesterday:

Added by Liz H. on Aug 24, 2015 7:56 PM
Ellie Sparks
RE: Selah and Lucy Ware Farwell
I posted the photos. Please feel free to use any photos of mine.
Added by Ellie Sparks on Aug 24, 2015 6:46 PM
Maureen and Ed Weatherly
You are very welcome
Added by Maureen and Ed Weatherly on Aug 24, 2015 5:57 PM
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