Carol Ann Anonson passed on April 16, 2019. She was born on December 7, 1942 to the late Garnier Peterson and Mary Montalbano.
- She was the loving mom of Todd (Donna) and Tom (Melissa); and grandmother of Sydney, Cali, Jacob and Abby. She was also the loving sister of Janet (Joe) Licari.
- She was preceded in death by her husband, Keith and her favorite of all, her dog Hope, who is jumping all over her in heaven right now.
- She was retired from JCPS where she worked as the bookkeeper at Smyrna Elementary for many years.
A service to celebrate Carol's life will take place at 7 pm on Thursday, April 18, 2019 at Arch L. Heady at Resthaven, 4400 Bardstown Road. The family will accept guests for visitation before the service from 3-7pm.
Eulogy for Carol given by Ms Beanie Miller on April 18, 2019
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Carol Ann Anonson Heather/ALH Resthaven
"What we once enjoyed we can never lose. All that we love deeply becomes a part of us." --Helen Keller
Good evening and welcome to everyone! My name is Beanie Miller and I am a Life Celebrant and it is my sincere privilege tonight to share with you the story of Carol Ann Anonson. She was dedicated to her family and known to give some of the warmest most comforting hugs. She had the love and partnership of husband Keith for 40 years. She was an incredible mother to Todd and Tom. She was grateful for the additions of her daughters-in-law, Donna and Melissa. She adored her sister Janet and brother-in-law Joe and she felt beyond blessed when her life was graced with grandchildren— Sydney, Cali, Jacob, and Abby.
It is important that we gather together tonight to stop and honor the special place that Carol had on this earth and grieve her absence. I realize there are no words to describe the variety of emotions present in this room. There is sadness and heartbreak, of course, because this special woman is no longer physically here with you. Perhaps there is a sense of joy for Carol that she had a beautiful full life and she is no longer suffering. I am also sure there is a universal feeling of gratitude … that this sweet, kind, and loving woman was part of your world.
There is a candle lit tonight in honor of Carol. The flame of a candle touches us in a unique way. Man may have discovered how to harness electricity and light a bulb, but we have not found a way to catch the beauty and wonder that a simple flame can stir in us. That flame represents the love, the joy, the energy, and the kindness that was Carol. It also represents the warmth she provided that will always burn within your hearts.
Carol was efficient. She left a folder behind with some instructions, including some song selections and a poem to be shared tonight.
One song selection had a note attached that read …
"I dedicate this to my two wonderful sons, my two wonderful daughters-in-law, and my four beautiful grandchildren."
That first song … for you … is My Heart Will Go On, by Celine Dion.
Isak Denison wrote, "To be a person is to have a story to tell."
This is Carol's story …
It was December 7th… a date that instantly has us reflecting on the tragic attack at Pearl Harbor but this was 1942 … one year later … and it was nothing but a joyous occasion! The bitter cold temperatures in Minneapolis, Minnesota could not dampen the spirits of Mary and Garnier as they welcomed their first born into the world --Carol Ann Peterson! Later they would move to Rockford, Illinois to be closer to family.
Dad was a machinist with John S. Barnes Company. He was a hard-working man from a small family. Mary, however was from a large Italian family having 10 brothers and sisters. Her parents—the Montalbanos -- both came from Sicily to America as teenagers. Huge Sunday gatherings at the Montalbano's home would become a tradition and undoubtedly, would help form Carol's forever devotion to family. She would have over 50 cousins in her lifetime. Their Sunday gatherings were loud, festive … and chaotic.
Carol was 10 years old before she would become a big sister to baby Janet. One can suspect there was joy along with the realization that she now had to share her home and parent's attention. Jan remembers her big sister painting her fingernails and taking her trick or treating but there was an age difference that affected Carol's budding independence. Jan also remembers being classified as the bratty little sister and hearing Carol ask ... "Does she always have to be here?"
Saturdays were a routine cleaning day for the girls … and the house was meticulously cleaned to perfection. Their mother was thorough, even to the point of regularly polishing the stainless-steel legs on the kitchen chairs. Jan remembers Carol sometimes using her big sister powers to con her into taking over her bathroom scrubbing chores.
At the close of the school day, Jan recalls how her and Carol would race to get to the television set. Whoever got there first would claim their stake on the viewing channel. Carol, who was always a lover of music, looked forward to watching American Bandstand but if Jan beat her to the set… They would be entertained by an episode of Popeye. Well, at least Jan would be.
Carol had several neighborhood friends there on 5th Avenue—Grace and Katie to name a few. As long as chores were completed, they would ride bikes or sit on a front porch and play board games or Canasta. Sometimes they would walk to the library and Grace said they practically lived on the nearby tennis court. Carol loved playing tennis and I understand she was quite good.
Two weeks every summer, the Peterson family would load up the car and take a sight-seeing trip. The trips weren't necessarily to any one location, but rather a navigational direction. They would see where the road would take them, stop and explore along the way, and then turn around and head home when they were nearing the end of their two-week mark. It was always an adventure.
Carol always liked to write. This was before Facebook, Snapchats and Twitter but she had pen pals—one as far away as Japan! She would later write poetry and dabble with song lyrics—even try to sell a few. She was very creative.
As a teenager, Carol liked hanging out with her girlfriends. They would go roller skating at the local Ing Skating Palace. Of course, there was attention from the boys, especially for petite brunette Carol. She was a bit shy but quite the beauty! Grace said she was always well dressed and never had a hair out of place.
Grace's mother was a widow and sometimes worked long hours. One year, a week before Christmas, Grace wanted desperately to get a tree home and surprise her mom for the holidays. It was snowing out and the store was some four blocks away. She called to ask Carol if her dad could possibly drive her there. He wasn't home but Carol told her friend to "wait right there." Minutes later she showed up at Grace's door and the two of them walked to the store and lugged the tree back … in the snow …up the back stairs…and without any help. It's a memory that Grace will always remember. "That's the kind of friend she was," she said.
Carol graduated East High School at the age of 17 in 1960. She went to work at the Illinois National Bank & Trust where she was the secretary to the Vice President.
Carol had her share of dates but the man who would eventually steal her heart was Keith Armyle Anonson. The two met on a blind date. He was a soft-spoken blonde who drove a red Ford Galaxy convertible. He was a good kind-hearted man and he won everyone's approval. Eventually, they became engaged and married on February 17, 1962. On their honeymoon they visited Florida, South Carolina, Memphis, Tennessee (to tour Graceland) and Frankfort, Kentucky. They arrived back home on Jan's 10th birthday, just in time to celebrate.
Keith worked for the Milwaukee Road Railroad. The couple rented a home in Mount Carroll, Illinois and settled in to married life and they were happy. On August 1st, 1963, baby boy Todd made his arrival. I can only imagine how Carol felt with that new infant lying against her chest. There is a quote that reads:
"The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is something absolutely new." --Osho
From all the evidence it seemed motherhood agreed with Carol. In fact, it was something she excelled at.
Keith was later transferred and they moved to Freeport, Illinois on February 23, 1968. Son Thomas completed the Anonson family. Todd remembers not being able to go to the hospital and waiting for his baby brother to be brought home. I'm not sure if their dog Wimpy felt the same way. Carol would get tickled that each time baby Tom would cry, Wimpy would also cry and carry on along with him. Two children could sometimes be a handful… but was also double the blessings.
Again, Keith's employment caused him to change locations —next to Winona, Minnesota. Sometime later they were sent to Milwaukee, Wisconsin.
This was the beginning of what both Todd and Tom admitted was a rather perfect life. They have many memories of their fun and adventures through the years. On pretty days they would ride their pedal cars around outside. Other times they would entertain themselves indoors, such as the time they placed large flaps of cardboard on the stairwells and sledded to the bottom. Todd said Tom often ended up in tears but it was just boys being boys.
The boys were Cub Scouts and Carol was a den leader. The boys also played baseball and will tell you that their parents never missed one game.
When dad got home from work, they all sat at the dinner table and ate together. Saturdays were pizza night and the only time that they were allowed to eat on TV trays in the basement. Occasionally they had fondue night which was always fun. Todd said they were sometimes referred to as 'the Clever family' … and he admits that they were rather perfect.
In 1973, Keith was again relocated with his job – this time to Louisville, Kentucky and that's when Carol said her peace. "That's it!" This is the city he would retire in and the family would come to know as home. They bought a house on Michael Ray Drive and planted roots.
They loved to travel! There were plenty of trips home to Rockford to visit family. There were also lots of camping trips with Janet, Joe, and their children-- Ryan and Jennifer. There were beach vacations and sometimes there were trips much like Carol's parents took her on—the kind where the car was just pointed in a direction and it was all about exploring whatever came along.
Tom remembers boasting in an elementary classroom that he had been in "every state east of the Mississippi and five states west." He also remembers a photo taken of him in Florida standing on the side of the highway and some three foot away from him is sitting an eight foot alligator!
Carol always documented their trips and vacations by scrapbooking their route, pictures, postcards and logged all the details. Beautiful memories preserved with her creative touches.
Carol was an active volunteer at Smyrna Elementary and served as the PTA President. Later, when Tom entered high school, she was employed there working in the office, later the cafeteria, then as a bookkeeper, and eventually running the bookstore. She worked there for 26 years before retiring.
John D. Rockefeller once said, "The road to happiness lies in two simple principles; find what it is that interest you and that you can do well, and when you find it put your whole soul into it—every bit of energy and ambition and natural ability you have."
When their boys were grown, Carol found she had more free time on her hands. Besides going back to work, she loved to read. She would rather read a good book than watch TV. Her favorite authors were Stephen King and Anne Rice. She was especially intrigued with the American Indians, absorbing any non-fiction on that subject. Carol taught herself to play the guitar and enjoyed her country music. Some of her favorite music artists were Bill Anderson, Elvis, Jimmy Buffett, Dwight Yocum, and Queen.
Tom and Todd married and Carol was thrilled that she now had daughters! She loved the family additions of Donna and Melissa. She loved shopping and spending time with them. She even gave them handwritten copies of favorite family recipes.
As a mom of two boys myself, I'm betting she and Keith were also looking forward to eventually becoming grandparents.
And … that dream came true for them!
First there was Sydney, then Cali, followed by Jacob, and then Abby. These tiny beings delighted her world in the most profound way! She looked forward to occasions when she could baby-sit, bond, and be entertained. They loved being grandparents!
Carol and Keith did enjoy their grandchildren but they also loved to travel. They enjoyed trips to the gulf coast of Florida where Carol would collect shells. They enjoyed trips to casinos and road trips in general. Their plans were to retire and travel a great deal more—perhaps to even sell their house and buy an RV.
But in 2002, just after retiring, Keith suffered a heart attack and passed away. Carol was devasted and her life was forever changed.
There is a proverb that tells us … "You cannot always have happiness, but you can always give happiness."
It's the grandchildren that are credited for pulling grandma Carol through that rough time. That was where she could find her happiness. Spending time with them was the best therapy for her to regain her strength and her purpose.
She loved watching Johnny Depp and Tim Burton movies in the basement with them, wrapped in blankets and eating popcorn. Sometimes she would pick them up from school and they would make ice cream sundaes. If she didn't have ice cream they would go out and get it.
She protected them. She listened like only a grandmother could, she guided them and comforted them.
Cali admits to going through phases where he would dress in expressive ways and recalls grandma Carol fondly calling him 'a hippie child.' "I was so offended at the time" he said, "but now I think it's really cool."
She once slipped on a snow- covered walkway with baby Jacob in her arms but jostled him in such a way, keeping him in a protective cocoon. She hit the ground but he did not. She broke her left ankle in three places but her grandbaby did not even suffer a scratch.
Carol loved buying gifts for others and the family would have what they called 'crazy huge Christmases' with massive amounts of presents under the tree. They would open literally over 100 presents and throw all the old wrapping paper in the foyer. When they were finished, the pile of paper was some three-foot-tall and the kids would jump in the paper as if it were a pile of leaves.
I'm told Carol made the most delicious treats—sugar cookies, chocolate chunk cookies, and candy cane cookies that cannot be duplicated. Her baked spaghetti and pretzel salad were also favorites.
In 2009, Carol was surprised and delighted when she was handed a YouTube video staring her grandchildren acting out a vacation trip to 'the trip you dreamed of.' Her family had planned and arranged for her and Jan to spend 10 days touring Italy. It was a fabulous time and I understand she took a liking to the lemon cello. They both came home with great memories.
Carol's health began to deteriorate. It started with a minor stroke and she recovered. But it was not the last one she would have. There would be hospital and rehab stays. She always had the love and support of her family but the recovery process required tremendous strength and determination on her part.
One day, she visited the Animal House and adopted a dog for companionship. She decided to name her Hope and she became oh-so-important in Carol's life! She loved Hope immensely and she could do no wrong in her owner's eyes. She spoiled her with more toys than she could ever play with. Hope brought her much joy.
But Hope was not the answer to all that ailed her. Eventually, Carol had to move into a garage apartment adjacent to Tom's house. She had care takers – whom she loved and appreciated-- and lots of family time but her health was wearing her down.
Jacob remembers visits with grandma Carol. He remembers making her grilled cheese as she sat covered in blankets. Abby will never forget her safe warm hugs. Cali and Sydney agree that she gave a special kind of embrace. She was a loving, generous grandmother and a great comfort to them all.
I want to share a reading with you called:
The Train Ride
At birth we boarded the train and met our parents, and we believe they will always travel on our side. However, at some station our parents will step down from the train, leaving us on this journey alone.
As time goes by, other people will board the train; and they will be significant, our siblings, our friends, the love of our life and even our children. Many will step down and leave a permanent vacuum. Others will go so unnoticed that we don't realize they vacated their seats. This train ride will be full of joy, sorrow, fantasy, expectations, hellos, goodbyes, and farewells. Success consists of having a good relationship with all passengers, requiring that we give the best of ourselves.
The mystery to everyone is this: We do not know at which station we ourselves will step down. So, we must live in the best way, love, forgive, and offer the best of who we are. It is important to do this because when the time comes for us to step down and leave our seat empty, we should leave behind beautiful memories for those who will continue to travel on the train of life.
Carol passed away Tuesday morning at 7:15 am. She vacated her seat on the train of life and she left behind beautiful memories. She gave the best of herself and she taught you all so much. She showed you perseverance and she was optimistic… never judgmental and always … full of love. That is her legacy.
Tom will miss her unconditional love and her positivity. Todd will miss her love, her companionship and her endearing quirky traits. Jan will miss her laugh and their times together. Donna and Melissa will miss her smile and her warmth.
Carol couldn't be standing in front of the porch waving goodbye to you today like she always did but she did want you to retain that image. This is poem she wanted to be shared with you tonight:
To those I love & those who love me
When I am gone, release me, let me go—I have so many things to see and do.
You mustn't tie yourself to me with tears. Be happy that we had so many years.
I gave you my love. You can only guess how much you gave to me in happiness.
I thank you for the love you each have shown, but now its time I traveled on alone.
So, grieve awhile for me if grieve you must—then let your grief be comforted by trust.
It's only for awhile that we must part so bless the memories within your heart.
I won't be far away, for life goes on. So, if you need me call and I will come.
Though you can't see or touch me, I'll be near—And if you listen with your heart, you'll hear all of my love around you soft and clear.
And then, when you must come this way alone, I'll greet you with a smile and a "Welcome Home."
- She was the loving mom of Todd (Donna) and Tom (Melissa); and grandmother of Sydney, Cali, Jacob and Abby. She was also the loving sister of Janet (Joe) Licari.
- She was preceded in death by her husband, Keith and her favorite of all, her dog Hope, who is jumping all over her in heaven right now.
- She was retired from JCPS where she worked as the bookkeeper at Smyrna Elementary for many years.
A service to celebrate Carol's life will take place at 7 pm on Thursday, April 18, 2019 at Arch L. Heady at Resthaven, 4400 Bardstown Road. The family will accept guests for visitation before the service from 3-7pm.
Eulogy for Carol given by Ms Beanie Miller on April 18, 2019
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Carol Ann Anonson Heather/ALH Resthaven
"What we once enjoyed we can never lose. All that we love deeply becomes a part of us." --Helen Keller
Good evening and welcome to everyone! My name is Beanie Miller and I am a Life Celebrant and it is my sincere privilege tonight to share with you the story of Carol Ann Anonson. She was dedicated to her family and known to give some of the warmest most comforting hugs. She had the love and partnership of husband Keith for 40 years. She was an incredible mother to Todd and Tom. She was grateful for the additions of her daughters-in-law, Donna and Melissa. She adored her sister Janet and brother-in-law Joe and she felt beyond blessed when her life was graced with grandchildren— Sydney, Cali, Jacob, and Abby.
It is important that we gather together tonight to stop and honor the special place that Carol had on this earth and grieve her absence. I realize there are no words to describe the variety of emotions present in this room. There is sadness and heartbreak, of course, because this special woman is no longer physically here with you. Perhaps there is a sense of joy for Carol that she had a beautiful full life and she is no longer suffering. I am also sure there is a universal feeling of gratitude … that this sweet, kind, and loving woman was part of your world.
There is a candle lit tonight in honor of Carol. The flame of a candle touches us in a unique way. Man may have discovered how to harness electricity and light a bulb, but we have not found a way to catch the beauty and wonder that a simple flame can stir in us. That flame represents the love, the joy, the energy, and the kindness that was Carol. It also represents the warmth she provided that will always burn within your hearts.
Carol was efficient. She left a folder behind with some instructions, including some song selections and a poem to be shared tonight.
One song selection had a note attached that read …
"I dedicate this to my two wonderful sons, my two wonderful daughters-in-law, and my four beautiful grandchildren."
That first song … for you … is My Heart Will Go On, by Celine Dion.
Isak Denison wrote, "To be a person is to have a story to tell."
This is Carol's story …
It was December 7th… a date that instantly has us reflecting on the tragic attack at Pearl Harbor but this was 1942 … one year later … and it was nothing but a joyous occasion! The bitter cold temperatures in Minneapolis, Minnesota could not dampen the spirits of Mary and Garnier as they welcomed their first born into the world --Carol Ann Peterson! Later they would move to Rockford, Illinois to be closer to family.
Dad was a machinist with John S. Barnes Company. He was a hard-working man from a small family. Mary, however was from a large Italian family having 10 brothers and sisters. Her parents—the Montalbanos -- both came from Sicily to America as teenagers. Huge Sunday gatherings at the Montalbano's home would become a tradition and undoubtedly, would help form Carol's forever devotion to family. She would have over 50 cousins in her lifetime. Their Sunday gatherings were loud, festive … and chaotic.
Carol was 10 years old before she would become a big sister to baby Janet. One can suspect there was joy along with the realization that she now had to share her home and parent's attention. Jan remembers her big sister painting her fingernails and taking her trick or treating but there was an age difference that affected Carol's budding independence. Jan also remembers being classified as the bratty little sister and hearing Carol ask ... "Does she always have to be here?"
Saturdays were a routine cleaning day for the girls … and the house was meticulously cleaned to perfection. Their mother was thorough, even to the point of regularly polishing the stainless-steel legs on the kitchen chairs. Jan remembers Carol sometimes using her big sister powers to con her into taking over her bathroom scrubbing chores.
At the close of the school day, Jan recalls how her and Carol would race to get to the television set. Whoever got there first would claim their stake on the viewing channel. Carol, who was always a lover of music, looked forward to watching American Bandstand but if Jan beat her to the set… They would be entertained by an episode of Popeye. Well, at least Jan would be.
Carol had several neighborhood friends there on 5th Avenue—Grace and Katie to name a few. As long as chores were completed, they would ride bikes or sit on a front porch and play board games or Canasta. Sometimes they would walk to the library and Grace said they practically lived on the nearby tennis court. Carol loved playing tennis and I understand she was quite good.
Two weeks every summer, the Peterson family would load up the car and take a sight-seeing trip. The trips weren't necessarily to any one location, but rather a navigational direction. They would see where the road would take them, stop and explore along the way, and then turn around and head home when they were nearing the end of their two-week mark. It was always an adventure.
Carol always liked to write. This was before Facebook, Snapchats and Twitter but she had pen pals—one as far away as Japan! She would later write poetry and dabble with song lyrics—even try to sell a few. She was very creative.
As a teenager, Carol liked hanging out with her girlfriends. They would go roller skating at the local Ing Skating Palace. Of course, there was attention from the boys, especially for petite brunette Carol. She was a bit shy but quite the beauty! Grace said she was always well dressed and never had a hair out of place.
Grace's mother was a widow and sometimes worked long hours. One year, a week before Christmas, Grace wanted desperately to get a tree home and surprise her mom for the holidays. It was snowing out and the store was some four blocks away. She called to ask Carol if her dad could possibly drive her there. He wasn't home but Carol told her friend to "wait right there." Minutes later she showed up at Grace's door and the two of them walked to the store and lugged the tree back … in the snow …up the back stairs…and without any help. It's a memory that Grace will always remember. "That's the kind of friend she was," she said.
Carol graduated East High School at the age of 17 in 1960. She went to work at the Illinois National Bank & Trust where she was the secretary to the Vice President.
Carol had her share of dates but the man who would eventually steal her heart was Keith Armyle Anonson. The two met on a blind date. He was a soft-spoken blonde who drove a red Ford Galaxy convertible. He was a good kind-hearted man and he won everyone's approval. Eventually, they became engaged and married on February 17, 1962. On their honeymoon they visited Florida, South Carolina, Memphis, Tennessee (to tour Graceland) and Frankfort, Kentucky. They arrived back home on Jan's 10th birthday, just in time to celebrate.
Keith worked for the Milwaukee Road Railroad. The couple rented a home in Mount Carroll, Illinois and settled in to married life and they were happy. On August 1st, 1963, baby boy Todd made his arrival. I can only imagine how Carol felt with that new infant lying against her chest. There is a quote that reads:
"The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is something absolutely new." --Osho
From all the evidence it seemed motherhood agreed with Carol. In fact, it was something she excelled at.
Keith was later transferred and they moved to Freeport, Illinois on February 23, 1968. Son Thomas completed the Anonson family. Todd remembers not being able to go to the hospital and waiting for his baby brother to be brought home. I'm not sure if their dog Wimpy felt the same way. Carol would get tickled that each time baby Tom would cry, Wimpy would also cry and carry on along with him. Two children could sometimes be a handful… but was also double the blessings.
Again, Keith's employment caused him to change locations —next to Winona, Minnesota. Sometime later they were sent to Milwaukee, Wisconsin.
This was the beginning of what both Todd and Tom admitted was a rather perfect life. They have many memories of their fun and adventures through the years. On pretty days they would ride their pedal cars around outside. Other times they would entertain themselves indoors, such as the time they placed large flaps of cardboard on the stairwells and sledded to the bottom. Todd said Tom often ended up in tears but it was just boys being boys.
The boys were Cub Scouts and Carol was a den leader. The boys also played baseball and will tell you that their parents never missed one game.
When dad got home from work, they all sat at the dinner table and ate together. Saturdays were pizza night and the only time that they were allowed to eat on TV trays in the basement. Occasionally they had fondue night which was always fun. Todd said they were sometimes referred to as 'the Clever family' … and he admits that they were rather perfect.
In 1973, Keith was again relocated with his job – this time to Louisville, Kentucky and that's when Carol said her peace. "That's it!" This is the city he would retire in and the family would come to know as home. They bought a house on Michael Ray Drive and planted roots.
They loved to travel! There were plenty of trips home to Rockford to visit family. There were also lots of camping trips with Janet, Joe, and their children-- Ryan and Jennifer. There were beach vacations and sometimes there were trips much like Carol's parents took her on—the kind where the car was just pointed in a direction and it was all about exploring whatever came along.
Tom remembers boasting in an elementary classroom that he had been in "every state east of the Mississippi and five states west." He also remembers a photo taken of him in Florida standing on the side of the highway and some three foot away from him is sitting an eight foot alligator!
Carol always documented their trips and vacations by scrapbooking their route, pictures, postcards and logged all the details. Beautiful memories preserved with her creative touches.
Carol was an active volunteer at Smyrna Elementary and served as the PTA President. Later, when Tom entered high school, she was employed there working in the office, later the cafeteria, then as a bookkeeper, and eventually running the bookstore. She worked there for 26 years before retiring.
John D. Rockefeller once said, "The road to happiness lies in two simple principles; find what it is that interest you and that you can do well, and when you find it put your whole soul into it—every bit of energy and ambition and natural ability you have."
When their boys were grown, Carol found she had more free time on her hands. Besides going back to work, she loved to read. She would rather read a good book than watch TV. Her favorite authors were Stephen King and Anne Rice. She was especially intrigued with the American Indians, absorbing any non-fiction on that subject. Carol taught herself to play the guitar and enjoyed her country music. Some of her favorite music artists were Bill Anderson, Elvis, Jimmy Buffett, Dwight Yocum, and Queen.
Tom and Todd married and Carol was thrilled that she now had daughters! She loved the family additions of Donna and Melissa. She loved shopping and spending time with them. She even gave them handwritten copies of favorite family recipes.
As a mom of two boys myself, I'm betting she and Keith were also looking forward to eventually becoming grandparents.
And … that dream came true for them!
First there was Sydney, then Cali, followed by Jacob, and then Abby. These tiny beings delighted her world in the most profound way! She looked forward to occasions when she could baby-sit, bond, and be entertained. They loved being grandparents!
Carol and Keith did enjoy their grandchildren but they also loved to travel. They enjoyed trips to the gulf coast of Florida where Carol would collect shells. They enjoyed trips to casinos and road trips in general. Their plans were to retire and travel a great deal more—perhaps to even sell their house and buy an RV.
But in 2002, just after retiring, Keith suffered a heart attack and passed away. Carol was devasted and her life was forever changed.
There is a proverb that tells us … "You cannot always have happiness, but you can always give happiness."
It's the grandchildren that are credited for pulling grandma Carol through that rough time. That was where she could find her happiness. Spending time with them was the best therapy for her to regain her strength and her purpose.
She loved watching Johnny Depp and Tim Burton movies in the basement with them, wrapped in blankets and eating popcorn. Sometimes she would pick them up from school and they would make ice cream sundaes. If she didn't have ice cream they would go out and get it.
She protected them. She listened like only a grandmother could, she guided them and comforted them.
Cali admits to going through phases where he would dress in expressive ways and recalls grandma Carol fondly calling him 'a hippie child.' "I was so offended at the time" he said, "but now I think it's really cool."
She once slipped on a snow- covered walkway with baby Jacob in her arms but jostled him in such a way, keeping him in a protective cocoon. She hit the ground but he did not. She broke her left ankle in three places but her grandbaby did not even suffer a scratch.
Carol loved buying gifts for others and the family would have what they called 'crazy huge Christmases' with massive amounts of presents under the tree. They would open literally over 100 presents and throw all the old wrapping paper in the foyer. When they were finished, the pile of paper was some three-foot-tall and the kids would jump in the paper as if it were a pile of leaves.
I'm told Carol made the most delicious treats—sugar cookies, chocolate chunk cookies, and candy cane cookies that cannot be duplicated. Her baked spaghetti and pretzel salad were also favorites.
In 2009, Carol was surprised and delighted when she was handed a YouTube video staring her grandchildren acting out a vacation trip to 'the trip you dreamed of.' Her family had planned and arranged for her and Jan to spend 10 days touring Italy. It was a fabulous time and I understand she took a liking to the lemon cello. They both came home with great memories.
Carol's health began to deteriorate. It started with a minor stroke and she recovered. But it was not the last one she would have. There would be hospital and rehab stays. She always had the love and support of her family but the recovery process required tremendous strength and determination on her part.
One day, she visited the Animal House and adopted a dog for companionship. She decided to name her Hope and she became oh-so-important in Carol's life! She loved Hope immensely and she could do no wrong in her owner's eyes. She spoiled her with more toys than she could ever play with. Hope brought her much joy.
But Hope was not the answer to all that ailed her. Eventually, Carol had to move into a garage apartment adjacent to Tom's house. She had care takers – whom she loved and appreciated-- and lots of family time but her health was wearing her down.
Jacob remembers visits with grandma Carol. He remembers making her grilled cheese as she sat covered in blankets. Abby will never forget her safe warm hugs. Cali and Sydney agree that she gave a special kind of embrace. She was a loving, generous grandmother and a great comfort to them all.
I want to share a reading with you called:
The Train Ride
At birth we boarded the train and met our parents, and we believe they will always travel on our side. However, at some station our parents will step down from the train, leaving us on this journey alone.
As time goes by, other people will board the train; and they will be significant, our siblings, our friends, the love of our life and even our children. Many will step down and leave a permanent vacuum. Others will go so unnoticed that we don't realize they vacated their seats. This train ride will be full of joy, sorrow, fantasy, expectations, hellos, goodbyes, and farewells. Success consists of having a good relationship with all passengers, requiring that we give the best of ourselves.
The mystery to everyone is this: We do not know at which station we ourselves will step down. So, we must live in the best way, love, forgive, and offer the best of who we are. It is important to do this because when the time comes for us to step down and leave our seat empty, we should leave behind beautiful memories for those who will continue to travel on the train of life.
Carol passed away Tuesday morning at 7:15 am. She vacated her seat on the train of life and she left behind beautiful memories. She gave the best of herself and she taught you all so much. She showed you perseverance and she was optimistic… never judgmental and always … full of love. That is her legacy.
Tom will miss her unconditional love and her positivity. Todd will miss her love, her companionship and her endearing quirky traits. Jan will miss her laugh and their times together. Donna and Melissa will miss her smile and her warmth.
Carol couldn't be standing in front of the porch waving goodbye to you today like she always did but she did want you to retain that image. This is poem she wanted to be shared with you tonight:
To those I love & those who love me
When I am gone, release me, let me go—I have so many things to see and do.
You mustn't tie yourself to me with tears. Be happy that we had so many years.
I gave you my love. You can only guess how much you gave to me in happiness.
I thank you for the love you each have shown, but now its time I traveled on alone.
So, grieve awhile for me if grieve you must—then let your grief be comforted by trust.
It's only for awhile that we must part so bless the memories within your heart.
I won't be far away, for life goes on. So, if you need me call and I will come.
Though you can't see or touch me, I'll be near—And if you listen with your heart, you'll hear all of my love around you soft and clear.
And then, when you must come this way alone, I'll greet you with a smile and a "Welcome Home."
Carol Ann Anonson passed on April 16, 2019. She was born on December 7, 1942 to the late Garnier Peterson and Mary Montalbano.
- She was the loving mom of Todd (Donna) and Tom (Melissa); and grandmother of Sydney, Cali, Jacob and Abby. She was also the loving sister of Janet (Joe) Licari.
- She was preceded in death by her husband, Keith and her favorite of all, her dog Hope, who is jumping all over her in heaven right now.
- She was retired from JCPS where she worked as the bookkeeper at Smyrna Elementary for many years.
A service to celebrate Carol's life will take place at 7 pm on Thursday, April 18, 2019 at Arch L. Heady at Resthaven, 4400 Bardstown Road. The family will accept guests for visitation before the service from 3-7pm.
Eulogy for Carol given by Ms Beanie Miller on April 18, 2019
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Carol Ann Anonson Heather/ALH Resthaven
"What we once enjoyed we can never lose. All that we love deeply becomes a part of us." --Helen Keller
Good evening and welcome to everyone! My name is Beanie Miller and I am a Life Celebrant and it is my sincere privilege tonight to share with you the story of Carol Ann Anonson. She was dedicated to her family and known to give some of the warmest most comforting hugs. She had the love and partnership of husband Keith for 40 years. She was an incredible mother to Todd and Tom. She was grateful for the additions of her daughters-in-law, Donna and Melissa. She adored her sister Janet and brother-in-law Joe and she felt beyond blessed when her life was graced with grandchildren— Sydney, Cali, Jacob, and Abby.
It is important that we gather together tonight to stop and honor the special place that Carol had on this earth and grieve her absence. I realize there are no words to describe the variety of emotions present in this room. There is sadness and heartbreak, of course, because this special woman is no longer physically here with you. Perhaps there is a sense of joy for Carol that she had a beautiful full life and she is no longer suffering. I am also sure there is a universal feeling of gratitude … that this sweet, kind, and loving woman was part of your world.
There is a candle lit tonight in honor of Carol. The flame of a candle touches us in a unique way. Man may have discovered how to harness electricity and light a bulb, but we have not found a way to catch the beauty and wonder that a simple flame can stir in us. That flame represents the love, the joy, the energy, and the kindness that was Carol. It also represents the warmth she provided that will always burn within your hearts.
Carol was efficient. She left a folder behind with some instructions, including some song selections and a poem to be shared tonight.
One song selection had a note attached that read …
"I dedicate this to my two wonderful sons, my two wonderful daughters-in-law, and my four beautiful grandchildren."
That first song … for you … is My Heart Will Go On, by Celine Dion.
Isak Denison wrote, "To be a person is to have a story to tell."
This is Carol's story …
It was December 7th… a date that instantly has us reflecting on the tragic attack at Pearl Harbor but this was 1942 … one year later … and it was nothing but a joyous occasion! The bitter cold temperatures in Minneapolis, Minnesota could not dampen the spirits of Mary and Garnier as they welcomed their first born into the world --Carol Ann Peterson! Later they would move to Rockford, Illinois to be closer to family.
Dad was a machinist with John S. Barnes Company. He was a hard-working man from a small family. Mary, however was from a large Italian family having 10 brothers and sisters. Her parents—the Montalbanos -- both came from Sicily to America as teenagers. Huge Sunday gatherings at the Montalbano's home would become a tradition and undoubtedly, would help form Carol's forever devotion to family. She would have over 50 cousins in her lifetime. Their Sunday gatherings were loud, festive … and chaotic.
Carol was 10 years old before she would become a big sister to baby Janet. One can suspect there was joy along with the realization that she now had to share her home and parent's attention. Jan remembers her big sister painting her fingernails and taking her trick or treating but there was an age difference that affected Carol's budding independence. Jan also remembers being classified as the bratty little sister and hearing Carol ask ... "Does she always have to be here?"
Saturdays were a routine cleaning day for the girls … and the house was meticulously cleaned to perfection. Their mother was thorough, even to the point of regularly polishing the stainless-steel legs on the kitchen chairs. Jan remembers Carol sometimes using her big sister powers to con her into taking over her bathroom scrubbing chores.
At the close of the school day, Jan recalls how her and Carol would race to get to the television set. Whoever got there first would claim their stake on the viewing channel. Carol, who was always a lover of music, looked forward to watching American Bandstand but if Jan beat her to the set… They would be entertained by an episode of Popeye. Well, at least Jan would be.
Carol had several neighborhood friends there on 5th Avenue—Grace and Katie to name a few. As long as chores were completed, they would ride bikes or sit on a front porch and play board games or Canasta. Sometimes they would walk to the library and Grace said they practically lived on the nearby tennis court. Carol loved playing tennis and I understand she was quite good.
Two weeks every summer, the Peterson family would load up the car and take a sight-seeing trip. The trips weren't necessarily to any one location, but rather a navigational direction. They would see where the road would take them, stop and explore along the way, and then turn around and head home when they were nearing the end of their two-week mark. It was always an adventure.
Carol always liked to write. This was before Facebook, Snapchats and Twitter but she had pen pals—one as far away as Japan! She would later write poetry and dabble with song lyrics—even try to sell a few. She was very creative.
As a teenager, Carol liked hanging out with her girlfriends. They would go roller skating at the local Ing Skating Palace. Of course, there was attention from the boys, especially for petite brunette Carol. She was a bit shy but quite the beauty! Grace said she was always well dressed and never had a hair out of place.
Grace's mother was a widow and sometimes worked long hours. One year, a week before Christmas, Grace wanted desperately to get a tree home and surprise her mom for the holidays. It was snowing out and the store was some four blocks away. She called to ask Carol if her dad could possibly drive her there. He wasn't home but Carol told her friend to "wait right there." Minutes later she showed up at Grace's door and the two of them walked to the store and lugged the tree back … in the snow …up the back stairs…and without any help. It's a memory that Grace will always remember. "That's the kind of friend she was," she said.
Carol graduated East High School at the age of 17 in 1960. She went to work at the Illinois National Bank & Trust where she was the secretary to the Vice President.
Carol had her share of dates but the man who would eventually steal her heart was Keith Armyle Anonson. The two met on a blind date. He was a soft-spoken blonde who drove a red Ford Galaxy convertible. He was a good kind-hearted man and he won everyone's approval. Eventually, they became engaged and married on February 17, 1962. On their honeymoon they visited Florida, South Carolina, Memphis, Tennessee (to tour Graceland) and Frankfort, Kentucky. They arrived back home on Jan's 10th birthday, just in time to celebrate.
Keith worked for the Milwaukee Road Railroad. The couple rented a home in Mount Carroll, Illinois and settled in to married life and they were happy. On August 1st, 1963, baby boy Todd made his arrival. I can only imagine how Carol felt with that new infant lying against her chest. There is a quote that reads:
"The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is something absolutely new." --Osho
From all the evidence it seemed motherhood agreed with Carol. In fact, it was something she excelled at.
Keith was later transferred and they moved to Freeport, Illinois on February 23, 1968. Son Thomas completed the Anonson family. Todd remembers not being able to go to the hospital and waiting for his baby brother to be brought home. I'm not sure if their dog Wimpy felt the same way. Carol would get tickled that each time baby Tom would cry, Wimpy would also cry and carry on along with him. Two children could sometimes be a handful… but was also double the blessings.
Again, Keith's employment caused him to change locations —next to Winona, Minnesota. Sometime later they were sent to Milwaukee, Wisconsin.
This was the beginning of what both Todd and Tom admitted was a rather perfect life. They have many memories of their fun and adventures through the years. On pretty days they would ride their pedal cars around outside. Other times they would entertain themselves indoors, such as the time they placed large flaps of cardboard on the stairwells and sledded to the bottom. Todd said Tom often ended up in tears but it was just boys being boys.
The boys were Cub Scouts and Carol was a den leader. The boys also played baseball and will tell you that their parents never missed one game.
When dad got home from work, they all sat at the dinner table and ate together. Saturdays were pizza night and the only time that they were allowed to eat on TV trays in the basement. Occasionally they had fondue night which was always fun. Todd said they were sometimes referred to as 'the Clever family' … and he admits that they were rather perfect.
In 1973, Keith was again relocated with his job – this time to Louisville, Kentucky and that's when Carol said her peace. "That's it!" This is the city he would retire in and the family would come to know as home. They bought a house on Michael Ray Drive and planted roots.
They loved to travel! There were plenty of trips home to Rockford to visit family. There were also lots of camping trips with Janet, Joe, and their children-- Ryan and Jennifer. There were beach vacations and sometimes there were trips much like Carol's parents took her on—the kind where the car was just pointed in a direction and it was all about exploring whatever came along.
Tom remembers boasting in an elementary classroom that he had been in "every state east of the Mississippi and five states west." He also remembers a photo taken of him in Florida standing on the side of the highway and some three foot away from him is sitting an eight foot alligator!
Carol always documented their trips and vacations by scrapbooking their route, pictures, postcards and logged all the details. Beautiful memories preserved with her creative touches.
Carol was an active volunteer at Smyrna Elementary and served as the PTA President. Later, when Tom entered high school, she was employed there working in the office, later the cafeteria, then as a bookkeeper, and eventually running the bookstore. She worked there for 26 years before retiring.
John D. Rockefeller once said, "The road to happiness lies in two simple principles; find what it is that interest you and that you can do well, and when you find it put your whole soul into it—every bit of energy and ambition and natural ability you have."
When their boys were grown, Carol found she had more free time on her hands. Besides going back to work, she loved to read. She would rather read a good book than watch TV. Her favorite authors were Stephen King and Anne Rice. She was especially intrigued with the American Indians, absorbing any non-fiction on that subject. Carol taught herself to play the guitar and enjoyed her country music. Some of her favorite music artists were Bill Anderson, Elvis, Jimmy Buffett, Dwight Yocum, and Queen.
Tom and Todd married and Carol was thrilled that she now had daughters! She loved the family additions of Donna and Melissa. She loved shopping and spending time with them. She even gave them handwritten copies of favorite family recipes.
As a mom of two boys myself, I'm betting she and Keith were also looking forward to eventually becoming grandparents.
And … that dream came true for them!
First there was Sydney, then Cali, followed by Jacob, and then Abby. These tiny beings delighted her world in the most profound way! She looked forward to occasions when she could baby-sit, bond, and be entertained. They loved being grandparents!
Carol and Keith did enjoy their grandchildren but they also loved to travel. They enjoyed trips to the gulf coast of Florida where Carol would collect shells. They enjoyed trips to casinos and road trips in general. Their plans were to retire and travel a great deal more—perhaps to even sell their house and buy an RV.
But in 2002, just after retiring, Keith suffered a heart attack and passed away. Carol was devasted and her life was forever changed.
There is a proverb that tells us … "You cannot always have happiness, but you can always give happiness."
It's the grandchildren that are credited for pulling grandma Carol through that rough time. That was where she could find her happiness. Spending time with them was the best therapy for her to regain her strength and her purpose.
She loved watching Johnny Depp and Tim Burton movies in the basement with them, wrapped in blankets and eating popcorn. Sometimes she would pick them up from school and they would make ice cream sundaes. If she didn't have ice cream they would go out and get it.
She protected them. She listened like only a grandmother could, she guided them and comforted them.
Cali admits to going through phases where he would dress in expressive ways and recalls grandma Carol fondly calling him 'a hippie child.' "I was so offended at the time" he said, "but now I think it's really cool."
She once slipped on a snow- covered walkway with baby Jacob in her arms but jostled him in such a way, keeping him in a protective cocoon. She hit the ground but he did not. She broke her left ankle in three places but her grandbaby did not even suffer a scratch.
Carol loved buying gifts for others and the family would have what they called 'crazy huge Christmases' with massive amounts of presents under the tree. They would open literally over 100 presents and throw all the old wrapping paper in the foyer. When they were finished, the pile of paper was some three-foot-tall and the kids would jump in the paper as if it were a pile of leaves.
I'm told Carol made the most delicious treats—sugar cookies, chocolate chunk cookies, and candy cane cookies that cannot be duplicated. Her baked spaghetti and pretzel salad were also favorites.
In 2009, Carol was surprised and delighted when she was handed a YouTube video staring her grandchildren acting out a vacation trip to 'the trip you dreamed of.' Her family had planned and arranged for her and Jan to spend 10 days touring Italy. It was a fabulous time and I understand she took a liking to the lemon cello. They both came home with great memories.
Carol's health began to deteriorate. It started with a minor stroke and she recovered. But it was not the last one she would have. There would be hospital and rehab stays. She always had the love and support of her family but the recovery process required tremendous strength and determination on her part.
One day, she visited the Animal House and adopted a dog for companionship. She decided to name her Hope and she became oh-so-important in Carol's life! She loved Hope immensely and she could do no wrong in her owner's eyes. She spoiled her with more toys than she could ever play with. Hope brought her much joy.
But Hope was not the answer to all that ailed her. Eventually, Carol had to move into a garage apartment adjacent to Tom's house. She had care takers – whom she loved and appreciated-- and lots of family time but her health was wearing her down.
Jacob remembers visits with grandma Carol. He remembers making her grilled cheese as she sat covered in blankets. Abby will never forget her safe warm hugs. Cali and Sydney agree that she gave a special kind of embrace. She was a loving, generous grandmother and a great comfort to them all.
I want to share a reading with you called:
The Train Ride
At birth we boarded the train and met our parents, and we believe they will always travel on our side. However, at some station our parents will step down from the train, leaving us on this journey alone.
As time goes by, other people will board the train; and they will be significant, our siblings, our friends, the love of our life and even our children. Many will step down and leave a permanent vacuum. Others will go so unnoticed that we don't realize they vacated their seats. This train ride will be full of joy, sorrow, fantasy, expectations, hellos, goodbyes, and farewells. Success consists of having a good relationship with all passengers, requiring that we give the best of ourselves.
The mystery to everyone is this: We do not know at which station we ourselves will step down. So, we must live in the best way, love, forgive, and offer the best of who we are. It is important to do this because when the time comes for us to step down and leave our seat empty, we should leave behind beautiful memories for those who will continue to travel on the train of life.
Carol passed away Tuesday morning at 7:15 am. She vacated her seat on the train of life and she left behind beautiful memories. She gave the best of herself and she taught you all so much. She showed you perseverance and she was optimistic… never judgmental and always … full of love. That is her legacy.
Tom will miss her unconditional love and her positivity. Todd will miss her love, her companionship and her endearing quirky traits. Jan will miss her laugh and their times together. Donna and Melissa will miss her smile and her warmth.
Carol couldn't be standing in front of the porch waving goodbye to you today like she always did but she did want you to retain that image. This is poem she wanted to be shared with you tonight:
To those I love & those who love me
When I am gone, release me, let me go—I have so many things to see and do.
You mustn't tie yourself to me with tears. Be happy that we had so many years.
I gave you my love. You can only guess how much you gave to me in happiness.
I thank you for the love you each have shown, but now its time I traveled on alone.
So, grieve awhile for me if grieve you must—then let your grief be comforted by trust.
It's only for awhile that we must part so bless the memories within your heart.
I won't be far away, for life goes on. So, if you need me call and I will come.
Though you can't see or touch me, I'll be near—And if you listen with your heart, you'll hear all of my love around you soft and clear.
And then, when you must come this way alone, I'll greet you with a smile and a "Welcome Home."
- She was the loving mom of Todd (Donna) and Tom (Melissa); and grandmother of Sydney, Cali, Jacob and Abby. She was also the loving sister of Janet (Joe) Licari.
- She was preceded in death by her husband, Keith and her favorite of all, her dog Hope, who is jumping all over her in heaven right now.
- She was retired from JCPS where she worked as the bookkeeper at Smyrna Elementary for many years.
A service to celebrate Carol's life will take place at 7 pm on Thursday, April 18, 2019 at Arch L. Heady at Resthaven, 4400 Bardstown Road. The family will accept guests for visitation before the service from 3-7pm.
Eulogy for Carol given by Ms Beanie Miller on April 18, 2019
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Carol Ann Anonson Heather/ALH Resthaven
"What we once enjoyed we can never lose. All that we love deeply becomes a part of us." --Helen Keller
Good evening and welcome to everyone! My name is Beanie Miller and I am a Life Celebrant and it is my sincere privilege tonight to share with you the story of Carol Ann Anonson. She was dedicated to her family and known to give some of the warmest most comforting hugs. She had the love and partnership of husband Keith for 40 years. She was an incredible mother to Todd and Tom. She was grateful for the additions of her daughters-in-law, Donna and Melissa. She adored her sister Janet and brother-in-law Joe and she felt beyond blessed when her life was graced with grandchildren— Sydney, Cali, Jacob, and Abby.
It is important that we gather together tonight to stop and honor the special place that Carol had on this earth and grieve her absence. I realize there are no words to describe the variety of emotions present in this room. There is sadness and heartbreak, of course, because this special woman is no longer physically here with you. Perhaps there is a sense of joy for Carol that she had a beautiful full life and she is no longer suffering. I am also sure there is a universal feeling of gratitude … that this sweet, kind, and loving woman was part of your world.
There is a candle lit tonight in honor of Carol. The flame of a candle touches us in a unique way. Man may have discovered how to harness electricity and light a bulb, but we have not found a way to catch the beauty and wonder that a simple flame can stir in us. That flame represents the love, the joy, the energy, and the kindness that was Carol. It also represents the warmth she provided that will always burn within your hearts.
Carol was efficient. She left a folder behind with some instructions, including some song selections and a poem to be shared tonight.
One song selection had a note attached that read …
"I dedicate this to my two wonderful sons, my two wonderful daughters-in-law, and my four beautiful grandchildren."
That first song … for you … is My Heart Will Go On, by Celine Dion.
Isak Denison wrote, "To be a person is to have a story to tell."
This is Carol's story …
It was December 7th… a date that instantly has us reflecting on the tragic attack at Pearl Harbor but this was 1942 … one year later … and it was nothing but a joyous occasion! The bitter cold temperatures in Minneapolis, Minnesota could not dampen the spirits of Mary and Garnier as they welcomed their first born into the world --Carol Ann Peterson! Later they would move to Rockford, Illinois to be closer to family.
Dad was a machinist with John S. Barnes Company. He was a hard-working man from a small family. Mary, however was from a large Italian family having 10 brothers and sisters. Her parents—the Montalbanos -- both came from Sicily to America as teenagers. Huge Sunday gatherings at the Montalbano's home would become a tradition and undoubtedly, would help form Carol's forever devotion to family. She would have over 50 cousins in her lifetime. Their Sunday gatherings were loud, festive … and chaotic.
Carol was 10 years old before she would become a big sister to baby Janet. One can suspect there was joy along with the realization that she now had to share her home and parent's attention. Jan remembers her big sister painting her fingernails and taking her trick or treating but there was an age difference that affected Carol's budding independence. Jan also remembers being classified as the bratty little sister and hearing Carol ask ... "Does she always have to be here?"
Saturdays were a routine cleaning day for the girls … and the house was meticulously cleaned to perfection. Their mother was thorough, even to the point of regularly polishing the stainless-steel legs on the kitchen chairs. Jan remembers Carol sometimes using her big sister powers to con her into taking over her bathroom scrubbing chores.
At the close of the school day, Jan recalls how her and Carol would race to get to the television set. Whoever got there first would claim their stake on the viewing channel. Carol, who was always a lover of music, looked forward to watching American Bandstand but if Jan beat her to the set… They would be entertained by an episode of Popeye. Well, at least Jan would be.
Carol had several neighborhood friends there on 5th Avenue—Grace and Katie to name a few. As long as chores were completed, they would ride bikes or sit on a front porch and play board games or Canasta. Sometimes they would walk to the library and Grace said they practically lived on the nearby tennis court. Carol loved playing tennis and I understand she was quite good.
Two weeks every summer, the Peterson family would load up the car and take a sight-seeing trip. The trips weren't necessarily to any one location, but rather a navigational direction. They would see where the road would take them, stop and explore along the way, and then turn around and head home when they were nearing the end of their two-week mark. It was always an adventure.
Carol always liked to write. This was before Facebook, Snapchats and Twitter but she had pen pals—one as far away as Japan! She would later write poetry and dabble with song lyrics—even try to sell a few. She was very creative.
As a teenager, Carol liked hanging out with her girlfriends. They would go roller skating at the local Ing Skating Palace. Of course, there was attention from the boys, especially for petite brunette Carol. She was a bit shy but quite the beauty! Grace said she was always well dressed and never had a hair out of place.
Grace's mother was a widow and sometimes worked long hours. One year, a week before Christmas, Grace wanted desperately to get a tree home and surprise her mom for the holidays. It was snowing out and the store was some four blocks away. She called to ask Carol if her dad could possibly drive her there. He wasn't home but Carol told her friend to "wait right there." Minutes later she showed up at Grace's door and the two of them walked to the store and lugged the tree back … in the snow …up the back stairs…and without any help. It's a memory that Grace will always remember. "That's the kind of friend she was," she said.
Carol graduated East High School at the age of 17 in 1960. She went to work at the Illinois National Bank & Trust where she was the secretary to the Vice President.
Carol had her share of dates but the man who would eventually steal her heart was Keith Armyle Anonson. The two met on a blind date. He was a soft-spoken blonde who drove a red Ford Galaxy convertible. He was a good kind-hearted man and he won everyone's approval. Eventually, they became engaged and married on February 17, 1962. On their honeymoon they visited Florida, South Carolina, Memphis, Tennessee (to tour Graceland) and Frankfort, Kentucky. They arrived back home on Jan's 10th birthday, just in time to celebrate.
Keith worked for the Milwaukee Road Railroad. The couple rented a home in Mount Carroll, Illinois and settled in to married life and they were happy. On August 1st, 1963, baby boy Todd made his arrival. I can only imagine how Carol felt with that new infant lying against her chest. There is a quote that reads:
"The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is something absolutely new." --Osho
From all the evidence it seemed motherhood agreed with Carol. In fact, it was something she excelled at.
Keith was later transferred and they moved to Freeport, Illinois on February 23, 1968. Son Thomas completed the Anonson family. Todd remembers not being able to go to the hospital and waiting for his baby brother to be brought home. I'm not sure if their dog Wimpy felt the same way. Carol would get tickled that each time baby Tom would cry, Wimpy would also cry and carry on along with him. Two children could sometimes be a handful… but was also double the blessings.
Again, Keith's employment caused him to change locations —next to Winona, Minnesota. Sometime later they were sent to Milwaukee, Wisconsin.
This was the beginning of what both Todd and Tom admitted was a rather perfect life. They have many memories of their fun and adventures through the years. On pretty days they would ride their pedal cars around outside. Other times they would entertain themselves indoors, such as the time they placed large flaps of cardboard on the stairwells and sledded to the bottom. Todd said Tom often ended up in tears but it was just boys being boys.
The boys were Cub Scouts and Carol was a den leader. The boys also played baseball and will tell you that their parents never missed one game.
When dad got home from work, they all sat at the dinner table and ate together. Saturdays were pizza night and the only time that they were allowed to eat on TV trays in the basement. Occasionally they had fondue night which was always fun. Todd said they were sometimes referred to as 'the Clever family' … and he admits that they were rather perfect.
In 1973, Keith was again relocated with his job – this time to Louisville, Kentucky and that's when Carol said her peace. "That's it!" This is the city he would retire in and the family would come to know as home. They bought a house on Michael Ray Drive and planted roots.
They loved to travel! There were plenty of trips home to Rockford to visit family. There were also lots of camping trips with Janet, Joe, and their children-- Ryan and Jennifer. There were beach vacations and sometimes there were trips much like Carol's parents took her on—the kind where the car was just pointed in a direction and it was all about exploring whatever came along.
Tom remembers boasting in an elementary classroom that he had been in "every state east of the Mississippi and five states west." He also remembers a photo taken of him in Florida standing on the side of the highway and some three foot away from him is sitting an eight foot alligator!
Carol always documented their trips and vacations by scrapbooking their route, pictures, postcards and logged all the details. Beautiful memories preserved with her creative touches.
Carol was an active volunteer at Smyrna Elementary and served as the PTA President. Later, when Tom entered high school, she was employed there working in the office, later the cafeteria, then as a bookkeeper, and eventually running the bookstore. She worked there for 26 years before retiring.
John D. Rockefeller once said, "The road to happiness lies in two simple principles; find what it is that interest you and that you can do well, and when you find it put your whole soul into it—every bit of energy and ambition and natural ability you have."
When their boys were grown, Carol found she had more free time on her hands. Besides going back to work, she loved to read. She would rather read a good book than watch TV. Her favorite authors were Stephen King and Anne Rice. She was especially intrigued with the American Indians, absorbing any non-fiction on that subject. Carol taught herself to play the guitar and enjoyed her country music. Some of her favorite music artists were Bill Anderson, Elvis, Jimmy Buffett, Dwight Yocum, and Queen.
Tom and Todd married and Carol was thrilled that she now had daughters! She loved the family additions of Donna and Melissa. She loved shopping and spending time with them. She even gave them handwritten copies of favorite family recipes.
As a mom of two boys myself, I'm betting she and Keith were also looking forward to eventually becoming grandparents.
And … that dream came true for them!
First there was Sydney, then Cali, followed by Jacob, and then Abby. These tiny beings delighted her world in the most profound way! She looked forward to occasions when she could baby-sit, bond, and be entertained. They loved being grandparents!
Carol and Keith did enjoy their grandchildren but they also loved to travel. They enjoyed trips to the gulf coast of Florida where Carol would collect shells. They enjoyed trips to casinos and road trips in general. Their plans were to retire and travel a great deal more—perhaps to even sell their house and buy an RV.
But in 2002, just after retiring, Keith suffered a heart attack and passed away. Carol was devasted and her life was forever changed.
There is a proverb that tells us … "You cannot always have happiness, but you can always give happiness."
It's the grandchildren that are credited for pulling grandma Carol through that rough time. That was where she could find her happiness. Spending time with them was the best therapy for her to regain her strength and her purpose.
She loved watching Johnny Depp and Tim Burton movies in the basement with them, wrapped in blankets and eating popcorn. Sometimes she would pick them up from school and they would make ice cream sundaes. If she didn't have ice cream they would go out and get it.
She protected them. She listened like only a grandmother could, she guided them and comforted them.
Cali admits to going through phases where he would dress in expressive ways and recalls grandma Carol fondly calling him 'a hippie child.' "I was so offended at the time" he said, "but now I think it's really cool."
She once slipped on a snow- covered walkway with baby Jacob in her arms but jostled him in such a way, keeping him in a protective cocoon. She hit the ground but he did not. She broke her left ankle in three places but her grandbaby did not even suffer a scratch.
Carol loved buying gifts for others and the family would have what they called 'crazy huge Christmases' with massive amounts of presents under the tree. They would open literally over 100 presents and throw all the old wrapping paper in the foyer. When they were finished, the pile of paper was some three-foot-tall and the kids would jump in the paper as if it were a pile of leaves.
I'm told Carol made the most delicious treats—sugar cookies, chocolate chunk cookies, and candy cane cookies that cannot be duplicated. Her baked spaghetti and pretzel salad were also favorites.
In 2009, Carol was surprised and delighted when she was handed a YouTube video staring her grandchildren acting out a vacation trip to 'the trip you dreamed of.' Her family had planned and arranged for her and Jan to spend 10 days touring Italy. It was a fabulous time and I understand she took a liking to the lemon cello. They both came home with great memories.
Carol's health began to deteriorate. It started with a minor stroke and she recovered. But it was not the last one she would have. There would be hospital and rehab stays. She always had the love and support of her family but the recovery process required tremendous strength and determination on her part.
One day, she visited the Animal House and adopted a dog for companionship. She decided to name her Hope and she became oh-so-important in Carol's life! She loved Hope immensely and she could do no wrong in her owner's eyes. She spoiled her with more toys than she could ever play with. Hope brought her much joy.
But Hope was not the answer to all that ailed her. Eventually, Carol had to move into a garage apartment adjacent to Tom's house. She had care takers – whom she loved and appreciated-- and lots of family time but her health was wearing her down.
Jacob remembers visits with grandma Carol. He remembers making her grilled cheese as she sat covered in blankets. Abby will never forget her safe warm hugs. Cali and Sydney agree that she gave a special kind of embrace. She was a loving, generous grandmother and a great comfort to them all.
I want to share a reading with you called:
The Train Ride
At birth we boarded the train and met our parents, and we believe they will always travel on our side. However, at some station our parents will step down from the train, leaving us on this journey alone.
As time goes by, other people will board the train; and they will be significant, our siblings, our friends, the love of our life and even our children. Many will step down and leave a permanent vacuum. Others will go so unnoticed that we don't realize they vacated their seats. This train ride will be full of joy, sorrow, fantasy, expectations, hellos, goodbyes, and farewells. Success consists of having a good relationship with all passengers, requiring that we give the best of ourselves.
The mystery to everyone is this: We do not know at which station we ourselves will step down. So, we must live in the best way, love, forgive, and offer the best of who we are. It is important to do this because when the time comes for us to step down and leave our seat empty, we should leave behind beautiful memories for those who will continue to travel on the train of life.
Carol passed away Tuesday morning at 7:15 am. She vacated her seat on the train of life and she left behind beautiful memories. She gave the best of herself and she taught you all so much. She showed you perseverance and she was optimistic… never judgmental and always … full of love. That is her legacy.
Tom will miss her unconditional love and her positivity. Todd will miss her love, her companionship and her endearing quirky traits. Jan will miss her laugh and their times together. Donna and Melissa will miss her smile and her warmth.
Carol couldn't be standing in front of the porch waving goodbye to you today like she always did but she did want you to retain that image. This is poem she wanted to be shared with you tonight:
To those I love & those who love me
When I am gone, release me, let me go—I have so many things to see and do.
You mustn't tie yourself to me with tears. Be happy that we had so many years.
I gave you my love. You can only guess how much you gave to me in happiness.
I thank you for the love you each have shown, but now its time I traveled on alone.
So, grieve awhile for me if grieve you must—then let your grief be comforted by trust.
It's only for awhile that we must part so bless the memories within your heart.
I won't be far away, for life goes on. So, if you need me call and I will come.
Though you can't see or touch me, I'll be near—And if you listen with your heart, you'll hear all of my love around you soft and clear.
And then, when you must come this way alone, I'll greet you with a smile and a "Welcome Home."
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