Couple’s dedication to family, friends and community eulogized at July 6 funeral

More than 1,200 people packed the sanctuary and social hall of Beth Yeshurun synagogue on Wednesday, July 6, to mourn the sudden loss of beloved community members Robin Perlo Berry, 40, and Joshua Bryant Berry, 41.

The young couple was killed tragically in a head-on collision in Fort Stockton, Texas, on July 2 – a late-night auto accident that also injured the Berry’s three children: Peter, 9, Aaron, 8, and Willa, 6.

The double funeral and burial marked the first time, since the accident, that members of the extended Berry and Perlo families all were together.

Robin and Josh were eulogized as dedicated spouses, parents, family members, friends, congregants, professionals, community activists, role models and volunteers.

Three Beth Yeshurun rabbis, David Rosen, Brian Strauss and Jack Segal, spoke at the service – Rabbi Strauss, as a close friend of the Berrys. They, and family members who also delivered eulogies, pledged short-term and long-term commitments to care for the Berry’s three children.

‘Lightning strike’
“Unfortunately, as many people know, this type of tragedy is too familiar of an experience, as we lost our dad eight years ago in a similar horrible vehicle accident,” said Josh’s brother, Matt Berry, who, with his wife, Simone, were named legal guardians of the children.

“We often discussed, with caution, that we were somewhat immune from things like this; that the chances of something else like this happening in the same immediate family were so infinitesimally small that we could live out our lives to ripe old ages with our wives and children. …

“But, here we are again. I’ve heard of people getting struck by lightning twice. … It struck us twice. And, I say to myself: It didn’t just strike us, it struck us really, really hard with an unimaginable force. …

“Never did we think or would anyone ever guess that we’d be in this situation that we are today. So, I’m here today to speak not just from the horrible tragedy that just occurred, but to say strongly to my big brother and Robin: We love you. We are here for you. We will be exactly what you thought we would be when you gave us this incredible honor and responsibility of caring for your beautiful angels.

“That we will advocate and fight for your children the way we do for our own children; show them the exact love that we believe you would do if you were still physically with us now.

“We have told them that you always will be with them forever in their hearts, in their minds and in their souls. That we will keep you alive for them so that they take you with them as they grow and have their own families. …

“We will be here for you as your family will represent the honorable lives that you lived. And, I swear your names will be heard in our house every day, and your kids will grow feeling loved by your constant spiritual presence.”

Matt Berry said Josh was an irreplaceable person, with whom he could share anything and who was always there for him.

“I had the deepest admiration for him, almost to the point of envy: how much he strived for perfection in everything that he did; how he was able to devote himself to a cause; his devotion to the community; his incredibly strong drive to be social and make friends, to be a wonderful friend,” Matt said.

“Joshua had the ability to forgive and to love … . He was an amazing brother, a great friend, an unbelievable father … and an incredible husband,” he said.

Matt said Josh fell in love with Robin at first sight. The two were the perfect couple. “There was no Joshua without Robin and no Robin without Joshua,” he said.

‘There is no why’
Robin’s younger sister, Amy “Aviva” Perlo, said she learned about Robin’s death the same way she learned two decades before that the Perlo’s father had died, by a friend handing her a phone and saying, “Call your mother.”

“It’s hard to bury a parent when you’re 19. And, it’s hard to bury a sister when you’re 37 – and when it’s your only sibling,” Aviva said.

The sisters shared a special relationship, Aviva said, marked by running banter.

“She would say: Why do you always have to have a deep conversation? Why can’t you just talk about something mellow and basic and shallow? And I’d say: OK, Robin, how’s the weather? And it would go on from there,” Aviva said.

Robin encouraged her sister to accept that there are some questions in life, such as why tragedies occur, that are unanswerable.

“What has Robin taught me in Torah? Aviva asked. “It’s her ability to do when she doesn’t understand. Her ability to function and not ask why. Her ability to go through tragedy and not pull every single piece of it apart like I do and always have … .

“This exit is the biggest and worst way of you affirming that same piece of Torah that you have been trying to tell me my whole life,” said Aviva, speaking to her sister. “This one I will listen to, and I will not search for why. There is no why.”

She continued: “I want to share Robin’s blessing and her words with all of you right now: Anyone who is struggling with finances or illness or managing tragedies from the past, or anything … . You should know that we should all be blessed that we have what we need to do what we want to do. We have friends and people around us that love us and support us and who will say: Do it now, and let nothing be in your way.”

“Love while you’ve got the chance’
Family was extremely important to Josh, said his brother, Adam Berry.

“As we got our own families, we became closer, because we were so intent on our kids growing up together and being close,” he said.

“[Josh] was a very smart guy – he knew a lot about a lot of things. You don’t get that much knowledge without having a true love for life, a love for living and a love for people. He was involved in so many things and took on so many things. One of the most amazing things about my brother was that he never stopped improving himself. …

“He was prolific at living. He became part of the energy, the pulse and the heartbeat of the community. And, he continued to take on new things and involve himself in new things to better himself as a person and better the community. …

“He loved life. He loved engaging with people and he loved being part of the community, and we were all just so proud to see him become this man. …

“He gave people the benefit of the doubt. He gave second chances. He believed so much in the good of people. … Josh wanted to forgive. He wanted to love. He wanted to find reasons to love people. …

Adam played a song he composed after the death of their father. He said that Josh encouraged him to become a professional musician and constantly helped boost his career.

He sang in tribute: “Love the ones you love / Love them all you can / Give them all the love you got to give while you’ve got the chance.”

‘Pray for refuah shlema’ Robin’s mother, Sue Perlo, said that Peter, Aaron and Willa are exposed to many aspects of life because of their parents’ positive influence, involvement in the community and dedication to tikkun olam.

She said that Robin and Joshua were “very, Berry happy in their lives.”

“It is unreal that we are here to eulogize and then bury Robin and Joshua. I wish it were not real. They were giving their children a life experience that, unfortunately, ended in death,” said Sue, referring to the family road trip to Colorado that ended in the fatal accident in West Texas.

The grieving mother expressed gratitude for the community’s support.

“The warmth and comfort and offers of help from all of you and others who are not here today is overwhelming. We thank you. …

“What can all of you do? Just be here for us. Keep calling. Especially pray for refuah shlema [healing and recovery] of Peter, Aaron and Willa.”∼age: 40 yrs 3 mos 1 day
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FORT STOCKTON, Texas (AP) -- A two-vehicle crash has left three people dead and four injured.

The collision happened late Saturday on U.S. 285, north of Fort Stockton in West Texas. Authorities said a Toyota four-door car carrying two people veered into the opposite lane and collided with a 2003 Chrysler van carrying five people.

A passenger in the Toyota, Colleen Doyle, 28, of Phoenix, died. The driver, Michael Scott Doyle, 31, of Phoenix, was in critical condition at University Medical Center in Lubbock.

Two people in the van, Robin Perlo Berry, 40, and Joshua Bryant Berry, 41, both of Houston, died. They were returning home from a Colorado vacation.

Three other passengers in the van were at Covenant Hospital in Lubbock.

Aaron Berry, 8, and Peter Berry, 9, were both in critical condition, and Willa Berry, 6, was in serious condition.

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Robin Perlo Berry, daughter of Sue Perlo and the late Phillip D. Perlo, and Joshua Berry, son of Della Berry and the late William B. Berry, passed away suddenly in a car crash early Sunday morning July 3, 2011.

They are survived by their three children: Peter age 9, Aron age 8, and Willa age 6, who are currently recovering from injuries from the accident.

Survivors include: Joshua's brothers Matt and Adam Berry, their wives Simone and Jackie, and Robin's sister Aviva Amy Perlo.

From synagogue life, to playing sports with their kids, to working out, going to the rodeo, recently partnering in the medical staffing business, and hosting parties and events together; Robin and Josh lived life to the fullest.

They had everything going for them and became a vital part of community everywhere they went. They shared a love and devotion for one another that truly made each of them a better person.

Robin and Josh loved their three children more than words can say. They were devoted parents who gave their children the best: a wonderful education, summer camp opportunities, and the freedom to grow into their own individual beings. May the incredible loss that we feel now be overshadowed by the sweet times that they shared with us.