Violet Lillian Carlson - Eulogy
Funeral Service
Sands Chapel
Nanaimo
Cedar Valley Gardens
September 18 2013

There is a time for everything
And a season for every activity under Heaven
A time to be born and a time to die
A time to search and a time to give up
A time to plant and a time to uproot
A time to weep and a time to laugh
A time to mourn and a time to dance
A time to scatter stones and a time to gather them
A time to embrace and a time to refrain
A time to keep and a time to toss away
A time to be silent and a time to speak
A time to love....

Pete Seeger

The story of the life of Violet Lillian Carlson is a rather unique story for her generation. This pioneer generation that she was born into was a generation where marriages lasted a lifetime; divorce was virtually unheard of and remarriages only happened when a spouse died; most often the wife in childbirth or a husband as the result of a farm accident. To be born into a family of 8 children to a mother who was married 4 times was a most unusual start to life. (NOTE - THERE WERE ACTUALLY 9 CHILDREN AND VIOLET'S FATHER, LEROY DERRILL ARMSTRONG, WAS THE 2ND HUSBAND OF ALICE OSBOURNE) Violet was born on April 10, 1914 at the beginning of the First World War near the tiny farming community of Eyebrow, Saskatchewan. Violet was living out her 100th year in the world.

Violet started life in a world where travel and farm work was all by horse power, no electricity, no running water; children were given farm chores to do almost from the time they could walk. Schooling was not consistent and few rarely got past grade 8 - especially girls. Violet loved music and she loved to dance and so it was not surprising then that Violet met Clifford Olsen from nearby Darmody and was married at age 16. She gave birth to their only child, daughter Alice the following year.

Unfortunately it was probably a case of too young, too quick, and within a few years the couple had separated leaving a teenage Mom on her own with a young child. Fortunately her Mom was still nearby and Alice spent a lot of her growing up with Gramma. One memory stands out from a time when Alice was about 8 years old. Along the way, Violet had earned enough money to buy an old 1927 Chevy coupe and was going to be taking Alice on a picnic to Bridgeford about 30 km up the rail line from Eyebrow. However before they could go, Violet had to take the oil pan off the car, remove a couple of shims and refit the pan; which distressed Alice terribly as "They were never going to get to the picnic" But it does demonstrate the resourcefulness that Violet would have learned growing up. Violet did all kinds of work to survive. Life was constantly in flux, as there were several men in Violet's life, moving to Regina and then to Calgary.

In Calgary, she worked as a seamstress, something she was good at, and during the war years drove a Greyhound Line pick-up truck, and did field work on a farm. In 1948, Violet married Max Koochin, which lasted for about 14 years. Now one of the characteristics of Violet was her sense of style; she was rarely seen out of her home when she was not suitably attired, make-up on, and hair done. And some of that may have come about when she was an Avon representative during the 1950s. Violet and a friend travelled all over Alberta selling Avon products; an independent and entrepreneurial woman.

By this time Violet had also become a grandmother to 5 grandchildren. She felt she was too young to be labeled a grandmother and so became Nana to all the subsequent generations. And there would be subsequent generations; 12vgreat grandchildren and then 8 great great grandchildren. At the risk of offending the granddaughters; it did seem that one of Nana's idiosyncrasies was that she appeared to prefer the grandsons. It could be that she just related more comfortably to the male species.

Sometime after the separation from Max, Violet would meet and fall in love with Aaron "Slim" Carlson. The two were wed on Sep 21 1964 in Trail BC, before moving to Cedar. Now Violet always loved dancing to country music and as Slim played the fiddle, Violet was always in attendance whenever he was entertaining. And whenever the family got together and music as played she would sing along. Sadly, Violet would suffer the death of Slim in 1970. Subsequently, she lived in Cedar for nearly 25 years before moving to Ladysmith.

The last contemporary man to enter Violet's life was her very dear friend Paul McDonough. It was kind of good that Violet always had a man, be it husband, friend or grandchild around, as she could be a bit of a "Princess" who needed people to do her bidding.

Still, all in all, a most remarkable life; a most unusual life for someone of her generation, a woman who had a free independent spirit, not bound by tradition. As it was a life that did not fit traditional forms and values it was life that each person in it must evaluate for themselves. Certainly she could have been one of Reader's Digest magazines, "Most Unforgettable Characters"